Laptops and cell phones may have revolutionized the world of technology with their ability to transfer data or send a message from one country to another, but has the ability to stay in the know at all times affected our relationships with other people? Every day we go through the same routine: Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, repeat. Throw in the occasional texting to parents or friends, and our world is surrounded by things that allow us to not have to directly talk to someone.

See your crush post an Insta? Like it to show your interest in them. Meet a cute guy at the bar? Add him on Snapchat so you can know if he goes out again next weekend. What happened to going on a date with someone you liked, or getting their number so you could call them to get to know each other better? Yes, all of this technology and social media has allowed us to keep up with our friends and family who may live far away, but it might be also giving us a way to avoid the reality of actually talking to people.

Let’s look at the situation from another angle. We’ve all heard about how social media is clouded with a fake reality, aka people only posting pictures of themselves when they look extra attractive, or have done something that they think people will find interesting. So when we look up somebody on Facebook, we can expect to see pictures of them going on fabulous vacations or going out with their friends in their hottest outfits.

But what about the person behind the makeup or underneath the basketball jersey? What do they like to do on a lazy Sunday afternoon? Where is their favorite place to go to study? What book do they read before falling asleep at night? Sure, texting and Snapchat might be able to answer some of these questions, but what about the details? Very few people actually get to know each other these days, and even relationships have turned into endless days of Netflix and chill and going to parties, rather than discovering the little things about each other. I’m not saying that all couples have this kind of relationship, but it’s sad how many do.

Along with all of this technology has come new words and definitions for different situations. Numerous times I have heard people ask if so and so are dating, and their responses often include something like “No, but they’re texting/snapping.” When did that become a relationship status? And when someone actually does make the commitment, you’ll hear “Are they FBO?” I get that we are a new generation, and that growing up with such technology should affect some aspects of our lives. But is allowing it to replace how we communicate with each other really the best way to utilize what it has to offer?

There is also a term for when you decide to stop texting/snapping someone, but don’t actually tell them that it's over: ghosting. When you ghost someone, you literally stop all forms of communication with them and hope that they get the hint so you don’t have to straight up tell them that you no longer like them. In my opinion, this is pathetic. Has technology really given us an excuse to avoid telling someone the truth about how we feel? You might think that this tactic will help you avoid upsetting them, but in reality, you will just end up causing more problems because they will wonder what happened and think that they did something wrong.

So next time you pick up your phone to Snapchat someone or like a person’s photo on Instagram, ask yourself if this is really the best way to show them you care. Is this someone that you could actually text to hang out with, or — *gasp* — call and have a conversation with? I get that this person might not be somebody you know well enough to actually call, but make the effort to have a real conversation instead of just snapping a picture of you and your dog. It may be the 21^st century, but it is time that we go back to having real conversations and going on actual dates with friends and loved ones. And when you actually do spend time with someone, put down your phone. If they wanted to sit in silence while you scroll through Facebook, then they wouldn’t have asked you to hangout. Technology is great and all, but don’t let it ruin the way we communicate.