You're on a date with your partner, having a good time when suddenly your phone starts ringing. You excuse yourself, check who is calling and it's...your ex. You debate between picking up or ignoring his call, but what if he/she got into an accident? What if his cousin that became one of your close friends have been trying to reach you. Or, their mom is asking for your family recipe for Christmas pie because she loved it.
So what do you do? You awkwardly send a text asking what they want and immediately regret when their reply come through... you.
I had never gone through that before, however, during movie night, a guy that was not my ex hit me up and dared to ask if I still had a boyfriend. What a joke! Later that week, I spoke to a friend, and she told me that that is a pretty common event. When you're happy with someone, the people that played with your heart come up to you trying to be all nice and try to have something with you; even though it's clear that you are serious about your current relationship.
So what to do?
The golden rule that we should all start practicing is to block your ex. The only exception to this rule is if you and your ex end in a good note (those are rare but are real). I used to think that blocking people was extreme or immature, but as time passed, I learned that sometimes, it is the best solution. Sure, you might have to block him/her on every social media and change your Netflix password. I would first block his phone number, but if it gets out of hand social media it is. Your ex must learn that their time passed and you have moved on. It may seem annoying that they are hitting you up after months of not knowing from them, but it's their loss.
2. Focus on your happiness.
You're not with your ex anymore. You are not spending hours wondering if you'll get back together. You're not chasing after them regardless of their red flags, anymore. Now, you are with a person that respects you, that accepts you and its there for you. The fact that someone that you once hoped or had something with is trying to be part of your life when you are content means that they are jealous and want to have what you have (or ruin to have what you have). Keep doing what you are doing, post pictures with your boo, go to double dates, and be happy.
3. Forget your ex existed.
When I say this, I don't mind completely ignore them. What I mean is, forget about all of the bad memories! As stated above, focus on your happiness. Don't let bad memories and bad experiences with your ex cloud your future judgment! For example, don't say that you don't trust anyone because your ex did you dirty. Yes, he did you dirty, so what? That doesn't mean every person you encounter from here on will do the same.