To put it simply, I guess you were the one that got away.
I wanted you, you wanted me, but we never wanted each other at the same time. We were never in the same time frame. And finally, when I thought we had managed to land in the same one, you went and jumped ahead.
I was confused and hurt, and some days I still am.
That's okay though because I'm moving forward.
For the last few years, I've watched as you bounced around from girl to girl, but never to me. My mom always said it was because I intimidated you. My best friend always said I was better off without you anyways.
I didn't care though because when we talked I could still feel that spark.
So I pined and I pined and I pined.
I got mad the way teenage girls do and I questioned everything about myself. From my looks to my smarts and even the way I talk, I questioned everything about myself. Why wasn't I good enough for you? Why did you never choose me? What was wrong with me? How could I have gotten so attached and you not even know? Or care?
Even when I was dating someone else or talking to someone new, you were a shadow in the back of my mind. You controlled my life by no means, but you were a thought often.
Even now, you cross my mind when I least expect it or want you to. But that's okay I realized.
I am okay.
I am normal.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with my looks, or my smarts, or the way I talk. There is nothing wrong with me, and there is nothing wrong with you. I am a firm believer in that most things happen for a reason, including timing.
Some people are just never in the same time frames.
I believe that right now, we are those people. So I hope you're doing good. I hope college is treating you well and that things are working out. I hope you catch green lights when you drive and that you always find the shortest line in the grocery store.
Because someday, who knows.
We could see each other while pumping gas or ordering food five years from now and it could be magic. Someday, somehow maybe we'll be in the same time frames at the same place.
Life is a mystery, and you never know what will happen next.