Have you ever felt like you have a need for validation? That, no matter how hard you try to not let other peoples actions and opinion's affect your emotions, for some reason it always ends up in the same result, either you taking things personally or taking offense?

Seeking Validation and allowing others to influence my mood has been a constant struggle for me, and a battle that I am continuing to work towards defeating in my mind because it is all mental. Nine times out of ten when somebody looks at you the wrong way, or has a bad attitude towards you, and you know you have done nothing to them to make them think poorly towards you, the person is facing a battle within themselves or their own lives.

Everybody is insecure and sometimes says things without thinking of how they might affect the people around them. I encourage you all to do a little self evaluation. Are you mentally stable? Do you associate with people that make a positive impact on you and push you to be better than what you already are? Do you continue to fall into the same bad patterns that you know you need to stop because you are scared of what life would be like without them.

If you said yes to any of these questions then I think that it would be wise for you to take a second to write it all out. It doesn't matter where, it doesn't need to be fancy, it just needs to be something that you can use to release all the thoughts that are swirling around in your head. The negative thoughts that are eating you alive and that you try to hide because you don't want people to know that you are upset. Just take a second to let it all out. It's okay to get upset sometimes, crying is good for the soul. Allow yourself to release all of the pain, the heartache, the anger, the frustration, the negativity. Let it go. You have the power to choose if you let the actions of others affect you.

My mom has always said, "people are fickle, and you need to learn to be comfortable and to validate yourself before anybody else can." You need to be happy with who you are and focus on what you do have and what is going good in your life, and to then take out all that is negative energy and bad vibes in your life. I know that it can be hard to do this, because you want to make everybody happy, but at the end of the day, if what you are doing does not make you happy, what was all of the stress and time you spent doing it for?

At some point we all need to start putting ourselves first. When you are depressed or down and feeling alone, how do you cope? We can not continue to rely on friends or associates or family to make us feel validated, we need to start looking towards ourselves. I am a faithful Christian so I always say to give everything to the one who loves you more than anything and created you to be successful, beautiful, and thriving. Let God guide your life.

Do not let people decide how you are as a person, keep the faith, and live loved knowing that when it seems nobody else is there, God will always be there. He has always been there for you, and will always love you whether you think he is there or not. God does not work on our time, but he works on his own time. What God has for you is for you and nobody can take that from you. Every day you need to decide how you want to live. Every day you need to choose to live loved knowing that there is somebody out there who loves you unconditionally.

Whether you are black, white, homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, Asexual, God loves us all and he wants nothing in return but for us to live according to his purpose. Start today by choosing to live loved, and take each day as a new chance to practice self love and self care. You are strong, you are beautiful, and there is nobody else like you. You are more than enough.

You do not need a man or a woman, or family, or a job, or life to define you. It is okay to do things for yourself sometimes, because at the end of the day it will be you looking yourself in the mirror. You are your own person and deserve to be happy. Live for the now. Live with peace of mind. Live Loved.