The Biblical Definition Of Marriage And Why Love Should Win
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The Biblical Definition Of Marriage And Why Love Should Win

From a biblical perspective, the text is far from conclusive. What is needed is a deep understanding of not only what the words say, but also the context around the words.

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The Biblical Definition Of Marriage And Why Love Should Win
listovative.com

Hi everyone, if you have kept up with any of my articles before you know I like to rant. This piece while yes is a bit of a rant also involved a lot of research and exploration of The Bible and the words within it. I am in no way trying to tear down the value of the word of the Lord and am in no way trying to disrespect religion and those who practice it. This is a hot button topic and is obviously open to debate. With that being said, if this is a topic that you are looking to see the other perspective on, please read. If this is a topic in which you also have a similar view, please read. If you are willing to have an open mind about the words I have laid out, please read. If this is going to cause any type of frustration, stress, or aggravation please do not read. These are thoughts and interpretation of sources. I am not saying I am right and God is wrong... this is simply my understanding. With that, I know the piece is long and I will bold points I find to be main topics. I appreciate the open minds, thank you for taking the time to read.

Though same-sex marriage is now legal in America, it is an ongoing debate that many struggle with today. Religion plays a large roll in the lives of many whether it is in regards to their social life, their work, their family, or a combination of the three. Sometimes people redirect their religious values onto others and that is why interpretation of religion is so important. In the Christian religion, the interpretation of The Bible is vital to the argument against same sex marriage. I myself have read my fair share of persuasive essays about giving rights back to the LGBTQ community but similar to most arguments, there are two sides to this debate. I think in order to fully and properly portray an argument there must be an understanding of the perspective belonging to the other side. Growing up, my best friend was very religious. She attends church every Sunday, she reads The Bible when she is lacking an understanding of a situation, and she really uses religion as her compass. Growing up, I’ve been gay. Now you can imagine this was an interesting conversation when I decided it was time to come out to her. She didn’t understand how I could defy The Bible, and while she accepted me, she still saw my sexuality as a sort of insult to religion. As the years have gone by I have still longed to understand her side. I like to understand what The Bible has to say about homosexuality/same sex marriage and as I have looked more and more into the passages of The Bible it seems that it begins to contradict itself. After research I found that the common biblical passages against same sex marriage and I discovered that they are contradictory to both the other words of God as well as how society is living today.

Over the course of human history, there have been various phases of mankind that have each been shaped by various circumstances. Influences were found in the form of people, civilizations, and invading armies. While all of these have had an immense impact on the history of the world as we know it, no single factor has had a greater impact on the course of human history than The Bible. Western civilization as it is known today is a direct reflection of biblical influence. The defense of arguments on topics such as slavery and marriage, have all been tied back to The Bible and the words that it contains. In today’s modern day, one of the greatest hot button issues revolves around The Bible: the definition of marriage.

Historically, marriage has been defined in western civilization as being between one man and one woman. According to many traditional marriage advocates, this has been one of the foundations of western civilization that has allowed it to evolve and prosper since the dawn of time. In today’s modern age, there is a change that is taking hold slowly but surely throughout the world. The push for marriage equality, redefining marriage to mean a union between two consenting adult regardless of gender, is a leading controversy in today’s world. For years leading up to the current date, The Bible and the scriptures within it have been used to deny individuals the right to marry because of the homosexual nature of their relationship. During this time, The Bible has been incorrectly and hypocritically interpreted in regards to denying the right to marry, specifically by using the argument of “traditional marriage”. Society and followers of The Bible are also ignoring ideas of the creation of man in Gods image, other equally damning “sins”, and the fact that within The Bible there is a lack of acknowledgment or condemnation of homosexual marriage.

Before particular aspects of the scripture can be evaluated and applied to the topic above, it is important to understand The Bible along with its history and influence. The Bible, as it is known today, is comprised of two parts: the New Testament and the Old Testament. The Old Testament is the first section of the Christian Bible. This section of The Bible is based on the Hebrew Scriptures (Old Testament). The Old Testament chronicles the time surrounding the creation of the world, up until the appearance of Jesus. The Old Testament, in particular the books of Genesis and Leviticus, are the major sources of Biblical arguments against same sex marriage. The book of Genesis has two particular points that are referred to in these arguments: Genesis 2: 19-25 Adam and Eve and Genesis 19 1-13. The use of Genesis 2: 19-25 regarding Adam and Eve is used to show that God intended man and woman to be companions to each other and carry on the perpetuation of civilization. Genesis 2 lines 20-22 state, “But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man” (NIV, Genesis 2). This has been interpreted as man and woman having an unbreakable bond between them.

Also in Genesis, Chapter 19, verses 1-13 is the story of the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. This particular portion of the Old Testament is used to describe the wrath of God towards homosexual actions (NIV, Genesis 19). In the story, God sent two angels to the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah to find good people within these cities. If they could not, God would destroy them. A citizen named Lot invited the angels into his home to rest and spend the evening. Men from all over Sodom came and surrounded Lot's house and demanded they be allowed to enter the home to commit sexual acts against the angels. God was so incensed by what happened that he destroyed the city (NIV, Genesis 19). Those who defend the traditional definition of marriage look to this passage as a direct condemnation of homosexual acts (Gnuse, 68-87). After reading these sections of The Bible many would be convinced that through The Bible same sex marriage is condemned as a sin. We are disregarding the bigger cause of discomfort here, gang rape. God seems to be condemning the vicious acts, not necessarily the homosexual characteristics of the acts. As mere humans who are we to determine what was meant?

The last two passages of the Old Testament that are commonly used as an argument against same-sex marriage are Leviticus 18:22 and Leviticus 20:13. In Leviticus 18:22. It is stated that, "Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination" (NIV, Leviticus 18:22). This passage is interpreted to say that same sex interactions are considered to an abomination. The second passage, Leviticus 20:13, adds to the passage above by stating, "If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them"(NIV, Leviticus 20:13). This passage takes the previous passage one step further and dictates a punishment. Also in Leviticus are many extreme laws, including not wearing clothing that is made of more than one material, and trimming your beard. If under God’s word we do not choose to listen to all of his laws why is the picking and choosing of what is considered reasonable lead to the condemnation of homosexuals rather than the condemnation of the girl across the way wearing a t-shirt made of both cotton and polyester (NIV, Leviticus 19)? As Christians in modern society we try to interpret The Bible as a strict set of guidelines rather than as a story and a potential compass to life. Unless we are taking each and every word of The Bible literally, the abominations referred to in Leviticus are not reason enough to condemn homosexuality and same sex marriage.

Within The Bible, marriage is not only defined to include only a man and a woman, as many critics like to claim, but is defined in a variety of ways. While there are many definitions of marriage, none are biblically defined to be a result of love and a committed relationship... so why can’t love win? First, in Genesis 2:24, the nuclear family is defined as a man and a woman (NIV, Genesis 24). Historically, these marriages were not based on love, as most homosexual and heterosexual marriages are today, but on arranged marriages that were based on how the union could benefit the families of the parties involved. Also in Genesis, 38:6-10, marriage is defined as a man and his brother’s widow, if she still has not had a son (NIV, Genesis 38). Also in Genesis, 16, a marriage can include a man, a woman and her property. “Property” can include slaves (NIV, Genesis 16). In Deuteronomy 22:28-29, marriage is defined between a rapist and his victim. A rape victim is required to marry her rapist, if she is a virgin (NIV, Deuteronomy 22). Again, there is no instance of a loving and committed relationship. While all of these marriages are between a man and a women, no sign of love is shown, simply convenience.

Throughout The Bible, there are instances of different types of marriages that are not tied to particular books of The Bibles and passages, but to the people found within The Bible. First, the type of relationship that is found within the verses is between a man, multiple wives and his concubine. One of the main figures in the Old Testament, Abraham, has multiple wives and children, in addition to concubines (NIV, Leviticus 20:13). A concubine is a woman that lives with a man that she is not married to and is ranked lower than the wives. Abraham is one of the key figures in The Bible and his marriage is not what is considered to be “traditional” between a man and a woman (NIV, Deuteronomy 22). So what does this say about The Bible? If not all marriages within its pages are “traditional” the fact that gay marriage isn’t “traditional” cannot be a valid argument. There is no singular definition of marriage and manipulation of The Bible’s words is not effective reason to condemn the love that others have for one another.

Another form of marriage that is found within the pages of The Bible is the marriage between a man and multiple women. This is known as polygamy. One of the major figures in the Old Testament, the slayer of Goliath King David, had multiple wives (Astle). Instances like this are used in arguments for polygamous relationships in the Church of Latter Day Saints. Marriage has several definitions within The Bible. While none of them include same-sex relationships, the various definitions prove the point that there is no biblical definition of marriage that needs to be upheld. Furthermore, marriages that are between one man and one woman were traditionally marriages of convenience.

The next argument that is easily overlooked is the notion established in Genesis 1:27. The passage states, “So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them”(NIV, Genesis 1). If man is created in the image of God, how can anything that is intrinsic to some people and is not a choice, such as sexual orientation, be considered an “abomination”. God makes humans in his own image and as such they must be loved and accepted for how God made him. Anything otherwise would be going against Gods intentions. While people are choosing to condemn rather than love people for who they are they are committing one of the worst sins of all. Acceptance and loving one’s neighbor are some of the most valuable lessons taught by The Bible and should never be overlooked.

Opponents of same-sex marriage also neglect to impose the same attitude of opposition to “sins” that are considered to be on the same level as homosexuality and same-sex marriage. Among these “sins” that have a blind eye turned to them are the use of birth control, adultery, and divorce. First, although modern birth control methods were not available in the time of The Bible, the biblical opposition to birth control is that children are a gift from God and the will of God cannot be controlled. There are instances where a character in The Bible practiced a form of birth control, was killed by God for doing so. According to the Guttmacher Institute, approximately 62% of women who are in their reproductive years are using a form of birth control (Contraceptive Use in the United States). Adultery is another point of contention. There are many people who commit adultery. While adultery is condemned in The Bible in various different verses, they all state the same thing: adultery is a sin. There are many “Traditional marriage” advocates that have committed adultery various times. Adultery many times leads to divorce. Divorce has two biblical implications. First, there is a notion that marriage is for life. As noted in Matthew 19:6, “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (NIV, Matthew 19). The second implication is that any divorced man or woman that marries again has become an adulterer. As stated in Luke 16:18, “Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery,” (NIV, Luke 16). These two aspects are constantly neglected by many who preach the notion of “traditional biblical” marriage. Again, the act of picking and choosing which excerpts from The Bible are more important is implying that only some of the Lord’s words can hold ground in today’s society.

A famous perpetrator of this act of hypocrisy is former Speaker of the House, Newt Gingrich. Newt preaches against same-sex marriage as one of his political platforms. Newt has been married three times, divorced two times and has committed adultery on each of his two former wives with the subsequent wife. Newt’s case highlights the two-facedness of many of the defenders of traditional marriage. They choose to condemn “sins” of others, while ignoring their own. Those who use The Bible to defend their stances against same-sex marriage, do so by picking and choosing which areas of scripture to preach.

Lastly, there is a lack of understanding of the historical context of many of the biblical arguments used against same-sex marriage. First, many of the biblical arguments against same-sex marriage are found in the Old Testament. This is significant in two ways. First, the Old Testament was passed down orally over years and years, from various families and people that were spread out. As with anything that is passed down orally, there is a distortion over time as to how things happened and what the original intent is. There have been various translations, each differing in its interpretation of the text. Secondly, the Old Testament is everything that happened before Christ. Christians differentiate themselves from their Jewish counterparts due to this belief in the Messiah. If this is the case, then why are books from a pre-Christ era being held in such regard?

Perhaps the most important contextual piece that is often ignored or misunderstood is the notion that there is no mention of homosexual relationships in The Bible, “between two adult, free people, who truly love each other”(Gnuse). In the destruction of Sodom, the type of homosexual activity described was violent and not loving. Men raping men was used as a form of humiliation during this time (Gnuse). As noted by Matthew Vines, “there is a world of difference between violent and coercive practices like gang rape and consensual, monogamous and loving relationships” (Vines). In Leviticus, the passages that are used to denounce homosexual behavior appear in what Christians would call the cultic laws of ancient Israel. It is often said that these cultic laws are no longer binding on Christians, so in actuality they are irrelevant for any discussion of homosexuality as a sin” (Gnuse). There are many other activities that commonly take place today that would be considered a sin under Leviticus. Some of these include: cursing at parents, adultery, letting your hair become unkept, getting tattoos, eating shrimp, and having sex with a woman in her menstrual period (Gnuse). It appears that only specific portions of these passages are being used to serve a particular purpose. If The Bible is followed for one aspect, then it should be followed for all.

There will always be differing opinions regarding same-sex marriage. There will be those that choose to turn to The Bible to back their arguments against same-sex marriage. They will continue to selectively choose which passages and which doctrine to support their arguments. The truth is that no one passage or combination of passages provides a definitive answer as to whether or not The Bible condones or condemns same-sex marriage/homosexuality. The one thing that is certain is that socially, same sex marriage is becoming more and more accepted today. There is a tide rolling towards marriage equality in a lot of areas in the world. From a biblical perspective, the text is far from conclusive. What is needed is a deep understanding of not only what the words say, but also the context around the words. It will be a debate that will continue for some time. While we all may not agree, we should all at least be well informed. At the end of the day, why shouldn’t love win?

Works Cited

New International Version. Bible Gateway.com. Web. 04 Apr. 2016.

"Old Testament." Theopedia. Web. 4 Apr. 2016.

Gnuse, Robert K. "Seven Gay Texts: Biblical Passages Used To Condemn Homosexuality." Biblical Theology Bulletin 45.2 (2015): 68-87. Academic Search Complete. Web. 19 Mar. 2016.

Astle, Cynthia. "The Many, Many Wives of The Bible's King David." About.com Education. 16 Dec. 2014. Web. 04 Apr. 2016.

"What Does The Bible Say about Birth Control? Should Christians Use Birth Control?" GotQuestions.org. Web. 04 Apr. 2016.

"Contraceptive Use in the United States." Guttmacher Institute. Web. 04 Apr. 2016.

Vines, Matthew.“The Gay Debate: The Bible and Homosexuality. ”Online video clip. YouTube. YouTube, 10 Mar. 2012. Web. 10 Mar. 2016. <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezQjNJUSraY&app=desktop>.

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