Hello my dear,

Before I'm in my thirties and you're a teen thinking your mom doesn't understand what you're going through, I thought I'd write down some of the best advice I could think of. That way, if you don't want to listen to me down the road, maybe you'll listen to 22-year-old me.

First and foremost, I need you to know that I've never cared about anyone the way I care about you. Our connection is so unique, and my number one priority and instinct is to protect you. You may not always understand my decisions, but you have to know I always have your best interest at heart.

No one knows you better than I do.

You can ask your fellow teenage friends for advice, but no one will ever be as honest with you as your mom. Remember that!

Please trust me.

You've always been rather independent--a girl after her own mom's heart! I love teaching you new things, but when you realize you can do it on your own, you stop letting me help you.

When you were a one-year-old, you'd get frustrated when you couldn't feed yourself perfectly. You knew how to hold your utensil and you knew how it worked, but you weren't quite ready to do it on your own.

I suspect this scenario will repeat itself (metaphorically) throughout your childhood. You'll get mad at me when I try to help because you think you can do it on your own.

Just so we're clear, I want you to be an independent woman. I won't ever coddle you or keep you from learning experiences on your own. However, if I tell you you're not ready for something, it's because as your mom, I KNOW you're not ready for it. I wouldn't dream of holding you back. You're my greatest success, and I want you to be successful.

Some people won't like you, and that's okay.

Everyone wants to be popular and liked. It's human nature. It's also a dangerous mindset to have because you'll find yourself becoming someone you're not if you care too much about pleasing others. Also, it's inevitable you'll be disliked.

Your very presence in a room will cause discomfort. Men will feel intimidated and females will feel threatened. Their glares will let you know.

If you're naturally outgoing, you'll be even more of a threat. People will say you're "flaunting" yourself or that you're "flirty."

Females will call you fake because you're "too nice."

Haters will say you "have no life" because you care about different things than they do.

People will always find something negative to say about you, but that doesn't make any of it true.

When people point out your flaws or make you feel stupid for not knowing something, remember that your imperfections are what make you special. Also, just because you don't know one fact doesn't mean you don't know any. Everyone is smart in different areas, so don't feel bad for not knowing everything about everything.

You will have lonely days.

There's going to be a group you wish you were a part of. Trust me, I've been there. But one of the most important lessons I've learned is to love who you are. Just because you don't "fit in" with a group of people doesn't make you weird or an outcast. It makes you unique.

Often, those "groups" are made of people who are all the same, have similar interests or share memories. Don't beat yourself up for not liking the same things they do. You're different. Own it.

After I learned this lesson myself, my self-confidence skyrocketed. I didn't care what anyone thought about me. I was 100% Lesly all the time, and that's actually when I made the most friendships.

People are fake. Don't trust anyone easily.

Your trust needs to be earned. People will take advantage of your kindness and will find ways to manipulate you. They'll find your weaknesses and vulnerabilities and attack them. It's happened to me way too many times. I fell for fake friendships in elementary school all the way through college.

Being lonely isn't fun, but at least you learn who's really there for you when you need them. Your true friends will be weird with you, and they won't ever judge you.

You won't feel forced to liked the same things because it'll happen naturally, and moments like this will define your friendship.

Don't go out of your way to get a guy's attention.

If a guy truly cares about you or even wants to get to know you, he'll make an effort. Trust me.

"But he's so cute and so smart, and I want him to notice me!"

I'm sure you do. But if you have to try AT ALL to get a guy to notice how funny, sweet or kind you are, then he's not worth your time.

Sidenote: if you're interested in a guy but haven't actually met him, feel free to figure out an organic meet-up. He can't be interested in you if he doesn't know you exist!

Some girls naturally get less attention than others and in those cases, they tend to be the ones who try hard. I know some pretty thirsty girls, and trust me, it's not a pretty look.

Don't change for anyone except yourself.

Don't try to impress boys - or anyone for that matter. You are always enough just the way you are. But I know sometimes, it doesn't feel that way.

If you're not satisfied with something in your life, make a change. I know too many people who complain about their job, weight, friendships, and/or finances, but never do anything about it.

Complaining won't change anything, only your mindset will.

You will be bullied only if you allow yourself to be.

Someone's opinion of you can only hurt you if you let it. If someone comments on the way you look in an accurate description (i.e. gap-toothed, acne, brace face) then all they've done is prove they have the ability to observe. Congratulations.

React to their hostility with kindness. Not only does this show immense self-restraint and maturity on your end, but they'll end up looking aggressive and dumb.

There's no point in hating something about yourself you can't change. You'll just waste energy and emotion on it instead of doing something you love. Don't let anyone rob you of your youth.

If someone comments on your appearance or personality with negative adjectives (i.e. ugly, fake, weird, gross), you let them know their opinion of you is irrelevant. Just because they say something about you doesn't make it true. All they're doing is showing they have more interest in your life than their own.

Repeat with me: "Your insult is your opinion and therefore does not bother me."

You might be a baby now, but one day you'll need this advice.

If you remember nothing else, please remember to stay true to yourself. There are seven billion people on this planet, and you shouldn't feel obligated to change just because one person doesn't like you.

Also, I love you. I love you so freakin' much. I'm always here for you, and I'll always be your biggest supporter. Never forget that.

Love,
Your momma <3