Right now, it’s April 2018 — Sexual Assault Awareness Month. I hope that by the time you read this, there will no longer be a need for a month-long campaign dedicated to sexual violence prevention. I hope that by the time you read this, committing or experiencing any act of sexual assault will be entirely unthinkable.

However, the truth is, at the time I’m writing this, sexual assault is nothing but thinkable.

At the time I’m writing this, one in four women will be a victim. I live in an apartment of four women — that could be one of my roommates. I have a mother and two sisters — that could be a family member. That could be me.

It was me at a point in my life.

But this article isn’t about me. It’s about you.

You see, the truth is, at the time I’m writing this, the vast majority of sexual assaults are committed by men.

I’m not assuming that man could be you. I hope it never will be — I pray it won’t — but that’s why I’m writing this to you. The things I’ve learned, witnessed and experienced up to this point in my life as just a 20-year-old are things that can’t be forgotten. They are things I want you to know. They are lessons I want you to learn. They are things I will talk to you about, over and over, and perhaps eventually I’ll sound like a broken record, but they’re important. They are five things that you need to know:

1. Sexual violence comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes

It’s any form of unwanted sexual contact. And when I say any, I mean ANY. It could be rape, sexual assault, sexual harassment, unwelcome sexting and catcalling... just to name a few.

2. Sex is NOT sex without consent

Without consent, it's sexual assault. It’s so important that you ask permission before touching someone. Consent must be clear and freely given, and it’s important to know that it’s OK for someone to change their mind at any time. If they do or simply say “no" to begin with, it’s important that you respect that. No pressuring, guilting or shaming. "No" means NO.

3. Violence is never the victim’s fault

What they were wearing doesn’t matter. What they were drinking doesn’t matter. How they were acting doesn’t matter. What does matter is the fact that someone breached their personal and emotional boundaries.

4. Relationships are never an excuse for assault

This may surprise you, but at the time I’m writing this, the majority of perpetrators are people who know the victim — whether they’re a significant other, friend, family member or another trusted person.

5. It’s important for men to be a part of the conversation

Just because you’re a man doesn’t mean you can’t be an ally to victims or potential victims. Sexual violence isn’t just a women’s issue — it’s everyone’s.

You see, at the time I’m writing this, all of these points are things that are not yet understood by everyone; If they were, “one in four” wouldn’t exist. If they were, an American wouldn’t be assaulted every 98 seconds. If they were, I wouldn’t have been.

As I said, I hope that at the time you read this, this issue isn’t one that is so prevalent anymore, but in the meantime, this is the reality, and I’m counting on you to help change it someday.