This week, I will be talking about a subject that is very close to my heart. Grammar. Now before you write me off as an English snob, I want to begin by acknowledging that my background and education have offered me a number of advantages that are only granted to a few students. Not everyone has the perks of attending one of the best high schools in the nation or growing up in a home where reading was not only encouraged, but celebrated. I am incredibly fortunate to have grown up in an incredibly supportive background. With the understanding that many people did not have received the same perks as I did, I make a point to avoid correcting people’s grammar. Nevertheless, one grammatical error has begun to make my skin crawl over the past few months.
It seems as though fewer and fewer people are able to tell the difference between me and I. This is a simple mistake; one I have made myself, in the past. In most situations, I would ignore the error entirely. Unfortunately, a number of my peers have taken it upon themselves to correct our classmates on the difference between the two terms, often incorrectly. So, to prevent any further confusion, here’s the full break down on when to use I and me in sentences.
I’m guessing you probably know the difference between I and me. Both words are first person, singular pronouns, meaning that they can be used by a person to refer to themselves.
You can use the word I when you are the subject of a sentence, meaning that you are the one doing the verb. For example:
I’m not sure what to write for my Odyssey article this week. Or, I need to find an internship, if I want to get a job after I graduate.
Me, in comparison, is an object pronoun, meaning that it should follow the verb.For instance:
Is there any possible way that chocolate cake could be good for me and that scientists have been wrong for the past hundred years? Or, Do you want to go grab a drink with me? I really need to get out tonight.
Easy, right? Well, hang onto your hats kids, because things are about to get complicated.
Both words can be used to describe something you’re doing with other people. Now I know that doesn’t sound too complicated but take a look at these sentences and try to figure out which is correct:
A) She’s going out tonight with Kate and me.
Or
B) She’s going out tonight with Kate and I.
If you picked A, congratulations, you chose correctly!
She’s going out tonight with Kate and me.
Since you and Kate are the object of the sentence, but not the subject (the one who’s actually going out) you would use the word me.
But, if the sentence read, Kate and I are going out with her, I would be the correct form, because you and Kate are the ones going out. Make sense?
Another way to think about it is by considering whether you would use the word I or me, if you were the sole subject. If you’re posting a photo of yourself and a friend, and wanted to label your names, the proper grammatical choice would be to label it as me and your friend’s name, or “(friend’s name) and me” in place of “(friend’s name) and I”. You'd never caption a photo of yourself I but would instead use the word me. Follow that same guideline when you're posting a photo of yourself and another person.
Does that make sense?
Now, differentiating the two terms seems relatively easy, but it can get confusing quickly. People tend to invert the two pronouns in abundance, both online and in speech. Moreover, many overeager grammar nazis like to correct people who use the term me in place of the word, I, often incorrectly.
This correction in itself contributes to the issue dramatically. When students are corrected for using me in place of I when saying things like “Lucy and me” it can become easy to assume that I is always grammatically correct. But, again, you would only use the word I if you are the subject.
Right: Lucy and I are going to the store.
Wrong: Lucy and me are going to the store.
However, if the sentence said:
Donna is going to the store with Lucy and me.
Me would have been the right option.
This might "sound weird" if you've become accustomed to hearing the word I in place of me. I can promise you that me is the correct term in this instance. If it makes you feel better you can invert me and Lucy, so it sounds more intentional, such as: Donna is going to the store with me and Lucy; but, I can assure you that me is correct in either scenario.
Yes, you may have had it wrong your whole life. Let me apologize now for shattering any expectations you may have had about the English language. If it helps, I can assure you that you aren't the first person to make this mistake, and you certainly won't be the last. Former President Bill Clinton made the mistake twice in his 1992 acceptance of the Democratic nomination.
"My mother was busy raising my brother and I [me]." / "Give Al Gore and I [me] a chance to bring America back."
So, the next time you're stumbling over words ask yourself, if you were alone, would you use the word I or the word me, and try to narrow it down that way. Now, please, stop correcting people for using the term correctly.
For more information, check out this video from CBS News clarifying the difference.