From The Girl Who Is Comfortable In Her Own Skin

From The Girl Who Is Comfortable In Her Own Skin

I am not even close to perfect, but I am good enough for me.

Lately, on social media, there has been a lot of body negativity floating around. From girls being too skinny, too thick, not curvy enough, too curvy, wrong skin color, etc., the negativity is extreme. And it's ridiculous. We have come so far in society, yet are so ancient in our standards of what we expect people to be. No one is perfect, period. There should be no standards, period — because each and every one of us was created differently.

Social media is the worst contributor to this negativity. It breeds it. You see celebrities on Instagram with a million likes and the constant repeat of the comment "bod goals." But most of that isn't even real. It is photo editing apps, filters or plastic surgery. And why are they goals? Why isn't the girl next door 'bod goals'? Why does everyone have this idea of what people are supposed to look like?

I'm done. I'm done comparing myself to others. I'm done thinking I'm not tan enough, or curvy enough, or in shape enough, or "perfect" like some others girls because that is not realistic. I'm 5'7, 116, with naturally dirty blonde, light brown hair, freckles, small curves and am a little "bony." I have scars from barrel racing, and scars from endometriosis. I have a messed up pupil from an eye injury. I have a unibrow when not kept after with tweezers. I don't have perfect teeth, even after braces. I have a pimple every now and then. I am not perfect. Not even close. But that is okay.

I am okay with myself. I don't have to have the curves of Kylie Jenner. I don't have to have the looks of Selena Gomez, Jennifer Anniston or Adriana Lima. They are all beautiful, yes, but I don't have to look like them to be my own kind of beautiful. And neither does any other girl on this planet. Or guy for that matter. We are all our own person and we were meant to be that way. The world would be horribly boring if everyone was the same.

SEE ALSO: The Dangers Of Comparison On Social Media

I am comfortable in my own skin. I will wear eye shadow even though it draws attention to my odd shaped pupil. I will wear shorts or a swimsuit even though they show the scars on my leg or my abdomen. I'll accept my unibrow when I don't have time to go get it fixed by my stylist (thanks, Stevie). I'll smile in pictures because my teeth are good enough for me. I don't need anyone's approval. I have my own approval. I am okay with all my flaws and who I am and that is all that matters.

My prayer for this world is that one day all these "standards" will be thrown out the window, and everyone will be comfortable in their own skin.

Cover Image Credit: 123rf

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5 Things I Really Wish I Knew ~Before~ Losing My Virginity

Advice to our younger selves.

Everyone has a first time. We're all at different stages of our lives when it happens, which impacts how we approach the situation and how we feel about it immediately after and in reflections. Some people idealize their first time, some people regret it, some people feel nothing about it. I agonized over my virginity.

I wanted nothing more than to throw it at the first willing participant. I felt that it made me someone inferior to my friends who had already had sex, like somehow I was missing out on some great secret of life or somehow I was less mature than them. I spent a lot of time wishing it would just happen, and then one day, it did when I wasn't expecting it. I don't regret my first time, but because I had wished for it to happen for so long, I had built up this image in my head of how it would be that was completely unrealistic.

So, this is for those girls like me whose imaginations get the best of them. Here are some tips to ease your worries and prepare you for what it's really going to be like.

1. It's going to be awkward.

Not just the first time, every time. No matter how much porn or how many blogs or erotic fiction you read, you will not have any idea what you're doing. The other person probably won't, either. There are too many variables, and you're both so concerned with doing it well, you'll be focused on too many things to properly control your limbs.

2. Don't think about your body.

The angles that are required for things to work leave both participants in awkward positions with limbs in strange places. Don't look at your body; don't even think about where your limbs are. Just keep your eyes and mind on the other person and what they're doing and how you're feeling. If you're feeling bad, let them know, so you can change it. If you're feeling good, enjoy it.

3. Don't do it drunk.

Not even a little tipsy, at least not for the first few times. Alcohol throws in another variable and another reason your limbs are flailing listlessly on top of other unforeseen complications. Just wait until you've had a little practice to introduce alcohol into the mix. You want to actually remember your first time and understand what's going on.

4. You're not going to feel any different after.

I expected to feel a weight being lifted or some newfound maturity, but I really didn't feel any different at all. That's because I really was just the same girl as before. Finally having lost this imaginary flower didn't make me physically any different at all.

5. You're going to feel something.

There wasn't some profound emotional release afterward, either, but I did feel a little different. Again, not in the sense that something had actually change, but I felt different because I had placed so much importance on this, on having sex, and now it had happened. I wanted there to be some big release or celebratory moment, but really, I just felt the same. I didn't even feel a little more mature or experienced. I was positive that if I ever did it again, I would still have absolutely no idea what to do (which was true).

Cover Image Credit: Seventeen

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working with special needs Children changed my life

Sometimes people do not take the time to get to know these people. But I did.


I have never thought about special needs kids before. I have never thought about how their life may be different or may not be the same. To me, these kids were someone that had something wrong with their chromosomes. I had seen them walking around the school and around town. It actually was not till the beginning of my senior year that I finally took a step back and looked at the big picture.

I was in my own little world where everything was perfect. But after stepping back, I realized that it's just as perfect. These kids and adults were so much like you and me.

The summer before my senior year we found out that my little brother had autism. He has Aspbergers Autism. He would have temper tantrums that would make the most patient person cry. Things were hard. But he was still my perfect little brother who I love more than anything in this world. He may have had something different about him but he was still the cutie that would fall asleep in my arms while I held him.

This taught me how to be patient with him and how to work with him. It was hard but I wanted to do it. I would look up how to help him. I researched ways to keep him from hurting himself or hurting others. My senior year of high school I had choir fifth period and our special needs program would come and work with us at the beginning of the class. We would teach them songs and dances. It was so much fun. We got to know these kids individually.

Getting to know those kids individually helped me decide on a career. I want to be a nurse for the children who are misunderstood and no one wants to help them.

I wanna help the parents feel comfortable that their child is with someone who understands them. People do not take the time to actually get to know these kids. They think that they are hopeless and are not worth anything. However, these kids are amazing and unique. They have beautiful hearts. Sometimes they never meet a stranger. Every time someone sees them or talks to them, they instantly have a smile on their face. Seeing them smile has become the best thing in my life.

Take the time to get to know them.

They are just like us.

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