From The Girl Who Doesn't Want Kids
Start writing a post

From The Girl Who Doesn't Want Kids

Stop telling me, "you’ll change your mind when you’re married"

From The Girl Who Doesn't Want Kids

Ever since I could remember, I haven’t always been the biggest fan of kids. The crying. The crazy schedule. The cost of everything. I knew I didn’t want them. Yeah, they are cute sometimes, but just not enough to persuade me otherwise. The whole idea of growing up to be a mom never seemed like something I wanted. Of course, I played house as a child and had “kids”, but that was play pretend, there was no actual responsibility. As a kid, I never thought about how many children I would have; that part was not important. Instead, I focused on what goals I wanted to achieve and how far I would go in life.

Older people often say to me “oh when you have kids, you’ll understand”, which usually makes me laugh at them and awkwardly bring up the fact that I do not want kids. This usually causes a reaction because they are baffled that a young woman would not want to add to the already overgrown population like she is “supposed to”, but it’s the way I feel and have felt for a while and it’s totally alright that I feel this way.

I have my reasons for not wanting to have kids, and yeah, some of them may be “selfish” but I mean, it is my body, isn’t it? For example, the idea of having a kid grow inside me is nothing close to beautiful; it honestly freaks me out. I can’t even place my hand on someone’s pregnant stomach. I suppose it is like a fear. I don’t like the whole turmoil and craziness that occurs within the body and I surely don’t like the idea of the “something is growing inside of me” feeling. Also, the whole childbirth thing is not something I foresee myself going through, ever. Nope.

Another reason? I plan to have huge changes in my life from living in big cities to traveling to just being a free spirit. With kids, freedom is lost. For some people, that is fine, it is exactly what they want. For me? It is the opposite. I understand that even with kids, you can have amazing life changes, but I am someone who plans to get up and go and with a kid, you really can’t do that. I am just thinking about the cool things I want to do and unfortunately, the plans don’t have room for a kid.

Of course, I still want to get married and have a future, but that doesn’t mean kids are a part of my future. However, I am someone who plans to support all of my friends when they decide to have kids. I want to be the crazy aunt to my best friend’s kids when she has them. I want to spoil my nieces and nephews and friends' kids. Just because I don’t want kids doesn’t mean I can’t spoil other people’s kids.

Spoiling other people’s kids is what I want to do. People still question my decision, but in the end, not wanting to have kids is my own personal thing. It is something I have thought long and hard about. It may not make sense to you but it doesn’t have to. Why? Because it is my body, and my body, my choice. The reality? A lot of other girls feel this way and instead of questioning them or trying to convince them, accept their choice and move on. It is 2017. Women don’t have to have kids if they don’t want to. It’s a choice; it’s my choice.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Robert Bye on Unsplash

I live by New York City and I am so excited for all of the summer adventures.

Keep Reading... Show less

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.


The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers


Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series


Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

How Young Feminists Can Understand And Subvert The Internalized Male Gaze

Women's self-commodification, applied through oppression and permission, is an elusive yet sexist characteristic of a laissez-faire society, where women solely exist to be consumed. (P.S. justice for Megan Fox)

Paramount Pictures

Within various theories of social science and visual media, academics present the male gaze as a nebulous idea during their headache-inducing meta-discussions. However, the internalized male gaze is a reality, which is present to most people who identify as women. As we mature, we experience realizations of the perpetual male gaze.

Keep Reading... Show less

It's Important To Remind Yourself To Be Open-Minded And Embrace All Life Has To Offer

Why should you be open-minded when it is so easy to be close-minded?


Open-mindedness. It is something we all need a reminder of some days. Whether it's in regards to politics, religion, everyday life, or rarities in life, it is crucial to be open-minded. I want to encourage everyone to look at something with an unbiased and unfazed point of view. I oftentimes struggle with this myself.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments