Growing up an only child, I learned to do everything alone. I played with Barbies by myself, I went to the park by myself, hell, I even learned how to play board games by myself (even though I normally cheated).

By the time I reached middle school, I discovered that having friends was far better than playing Monopoly by myself. I started doing everything with my friends. I never wanted to be alone.

From that point on, I felt as though if I was not with someone or doing something exciting with my family, I was boring. It didn't take much to equate boring with being a loser, every middle schooler's biggest fear.

This feeling only magnified as I entered high school. I filled my time with extracurriculars, friends, and, of course, boys. With every heartbreak and betrayal, I became more reliant on others to mend my loneliness.

I began to take everything others did personally and presumed that I was a terrible person, or doing something wrong just because people did not want to spend every waking minute with me. I couldn't understand why I continuously felt like I was giving people everything I had to offer, while I was merely a second priority.

I wanted to control everyone around me. I figured if I control the way people acted, I could control how they felt about me. But that's no way to live or to love. You cannot control genuine human emotion.

It was not until recently that I realized that the problem didn't lie within my relationships with others, rather within my relationship with myself. The problem wasn't that people were not making me a priority, it was that everyone was trying to make themselves happy.

I had been so busy worrying about what everyone else thought of me to even begin to focus on my own well-being. And that was what I needed, not attention. Attention from others cannot make you truly happy. Only you can make yourself happy.

So here I am. Completely and utterly me. Nothing can make me happy until I choose to be happy. No one can make me happy until I choose to be happy on my own.

Somedays will be harder than others. There will be days when I want to cry and drown my feelings in ice cream. And then I will laugh.

I will laugh and I will cry and I will live. I will live my life the best way that I know how. I will make stupid mistakes and I will learn from them. I will be young, but most importantly, I will choose to be happy.