The friend zone, a popular culture term, is defined as “a situation in which one member of a friendship wishes to enter into a romantic or sexual relationship, while the other does not”. The friend zone is known to be hurtful to the person who is rejected, as any type of rejection is likely to cause.

These feelings of hurt associated with rejection are completely normal no matter the situation, however, it is unfair to create a guilted situation such as the friend zone that demeans the person who unintentionally hurt you. No one should have to be put in a situation that creates such guilt simply for the fact that they do not have feelings toward someone or do not want to be in a relationship with them.

Most people have a desire to be loved and to be in a relationship, so if they are to turn someone down, they are likely to have a firm reason behind it. The person who is being put in the friend zone is often too hurt to care about this reason, and will immediately take offense and accuse the other person of being a friend zoner.

Sometimes, people are not ready to be in a relationship for one reason or another, such as recently getting out of a relationship, enjoying being single, or focusing on themselves, their careers or school.

Even if someone does desire a relationship, that does not mean they are obligated to date any person that shows a liking toward them. It is entirely okay and logical for them to not reciprocate romantic feelings toward the other person, and they should not feel guilty for not dating them.

Another issue with the friend zone occurs when outsiders convince one person that they are stuck in the friend zone. I see no reason why males and females cannot be close friends without being in the friend zone. Just because two people of the opposite gender are close does not mean they have to date.

In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with being friends with someone of the opposite gender and not developing a romance. Some of my best friends have been those of the opposite gender, and I do not understand why people assume two close friends like this have to eventually be in a relationship.

What I find particularly interesting is how much more likely one is to be accused of putting someone in the friend zone if they are a woman. Most often, you hear men saying they have been “friend zoned,” and almost never hear women accusing men of doing this.

Although being rejected is certain to hurt one’s pride and ego, there is no need to demean the rejector by accusing them of friendzoning you. The friendzone has no need to exist — people do not need to justify their feelings toward one another in order for them to be valid, and the concept of a friendzone only creates guilt.