To My Friends That Just Left Their Toxic Relationships

To My Friends That Just Left Their Toxic Relationships

I promise that from now on, my guard is up and nothing is going to get past either of us.

Alyssa Beebe

You have been an important part of my life for several years, but over the last year, you've been through more of a change than I have ever witnessed in our entire friendship. The things that we have all been through have made us prove our strength over and over again, but nothing has been more clear than this.

The relationship that you recently ended was something that made me often look at you and wonder where you got the amount of patience that you were able to maintain. You were happy, and he was kind. He wanted to meet us and your family. He took you to dinner and bought you a nice birthday gift. He stood up for you and when things got tough, he stood by you. Sure, you fought.

What two people didn't? Of course, there were times that you disagreed. No one can agree on everything. I didn't love everything that he did, but I was supportive. You never made me question where the relationship that you and I stood, so I had no reason not to support your relationship. And toxic relationships have a funny quality that masks them to everyone, including supporters.

It was crazy how quickly things managed to change. Suddenly, once you were ready to try doing things on your own, that guy that came over at 2 a.m. on girls' night and hung out until 4 a.m. became a monster.

I am sorry that I didn't notice before things got too serious. I wish that he would have shown that side of him that night. Instead, he was charming and funny and we got along.

On the plus side, you are doing so well right now. I am so proud of you. You have managed to become independent and strong and you know when it is time to walk away. You know when the chapter is over and you know to trust yourself. You know that it was not your fault, even though he had you convinced that it was.

It was crazy how quickly things managed to change. Suddenly, once you were ready to ask him to grow up, the guy that was fighting for your relationship was nowhere to be found.

I am sorry that I told you that he was worth all the fights. I wish that I wouldn't have told you that you were too overdramatic sometimes. Instead, I wanted to push you towards someone I thought you were happy with.

Now, I can see that you are truly happy. You have never smiled so bright or been so positive. You have something about you that has kick-started a revolution in our friend group. You are energized, outspoken, and confident. I don't know how I didn't notice that you lost it from the very first time we had met. But seeing it again is heartwarming. I missed it.

Your toxic relationships do not define who you are. I don't know where you are going from here, but I can tell you that it is forward from where you have been. You are becoming the best versions of yourselves and you should be incredibly proud of who you are.

I cannot wait to see where our journeys will lead. I promise that from now on, my guard is up and nothing is going to get past either of us. The amount of strength and hard work that you put into building yourselves will not go unnoticed. Thank you for never giving up on yourselves, because I wouldn't have.


A Proud BFF

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