If you’re reading this, then you or someone you know probably has not had the best start to the New Year. A couple weeks into resolutions, promises and 365-day-long commitments, you’ve seen some kind of setback. This setback could be personal, financial, family or health related. In all reality of Murphy’s Law, it could be anything.

That sucks.

It really sucks to start the year off with high hopes and good intentions, only to watch it go to crap within days, regardless of whether or not it’s your own fault. This world and the future are too unpredictable for any of us to fully control.

If you or someone you know is already struggling, I just want you to know this:

What is happening at this very moment in time does NOT set the tone for the other 300 some-odd days of the year.

This can be hard to believe, especially when things like illness in the family or losing a job feel like they’re the be all and end all of not just your year, but also your life when they’re happening. However, there are more variables than just unfortunate circumstances that determine the way your year goes. The biggest one is you.

As my grandfather likes to quote from his favorite movie, Young Frankenstein, “We accept our failures, as well as our successes, with quiet dignity and grace.” If you can proudly and bravely handle every time that things go well for you, then you should be able to just as well handle any unwanted situation that may come your way. We must handle things with quiet dignity and grace. Separating yourself from your problems to take a breath of fresh air and refocus yourself is not being naïve towards or neglectful of what’s going on around you- it’s being fair to yourself. It’s important to take care of yourself so that you can take care of others and problem solve.

It may seem that right now there is no answer in sight to your problems. I promise you that one is coming. The solution that resolves may not always be the preferred solution, but one will present itself. We just have to be patient sometimes. It isn’t easy to keep your cool when facing a problem that seems like it has the potential to destroy you from the inside out. The way that you attain dignity and grace is not just through belief in oneself, but also belief in others.

You don’t have to go through anything alone.

Sometimes a scenario is so strong that we cannot change it on our own. Sometimes we cannot change it at all in the time being, but having a support group of loving family and friends can get someone through even the toughest of times. It doesn’t even have to be just loved ones- maybe it’s religion, or faith in the universe, or a trained professional that gets you through the messy moments in life. It can be anything that gives you hope that today’s pain does not have to be tomorrow’s.

I know that right now it’s January, and it’s bleak and cold and dead outside. It’s been superstitiously said that the first weeks of a New Year are the most depressing and devastating of weeks wherein a lot of negative things tend to happen. If negative things are happening in your life, I am so deeply sorry and I send my most sincere condolences to you and all affected. I’m sorry that what was supposed to be the best year yet has recently been anything but.

Just know that you still have another hundred days for things to turn around.

Stay positive.