The Five Stages of Acceptance Every Pale Girl Goes Through In The Summer | The Odyssey Online
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The Five Stages of Acceptance Every Pale Girl Goes Through In The Summer

Embrace the paste.

Emily Whelahan
Jul 06, 2015
University of Delaware
30
The Five Stages of Acceptance Every Pale Girl Goes Through In The Summer

Stage 1: Denial

Summer is finally here, and you are ready to soak up all the rays you possibly can. SPF 8 should be fine. I mean, that’s what all your friends are using.

Stage 2: The Worst Sunburn of Your Life

You forgot that all of your friends are naturally tan goddesses, and you, on the other hand, are far from that; so, now it hurts to breath.

Stage 3: Self-Tanner

You are still in your get-tan-at-any-cost-mindset, so you decide to not pose any more risks to your health and try out some self-tanner. The only issue is that your previous sunburn and new orange glow make you look like a Flamin' Hot Cheeto.

Stage 4: Anger

Your inability to become a bronzed babe is beginning to take its toll. You are now in a bitter state. You automatically hate every tan person you see

Stage 5: True Acceptance AKA Embrace the Paste

Why be mad about something that you can’t change about yourself? Own it, you pale diva! However, you will own it while wearing at least SPF 30 at all times, of course.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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