I Saw My First Protest, And I Felt Like I Wasn't Allowed To Have A Voice

I Saw My First Protest, And I Felt Like I Wasn't Allowed To Have A Voice

It’s as if we are at war with our own country.
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Americans are blessed to be citizens of a country who, under the law, obtain the freedom of speech. Each and every one of us gets to have a voice about whatever, whenever we want.

...So how come when I saw my first protest I felt as if I was restricted?

Now, I’m not saying that I joined in and was just speaking my mind. I’m saying, I felt as if there was a lot to take in, and if I were to say one thing, I would be intimidated.

It is a crazy concept to grasp because if I were to disagree with what the protestors were preaching, I would be ridiculed, yet they want us to listen to them. People involved claim to be “protesting,” but they’re one-sided and refuse to listen to valid points of everyone they are protesting against.

...So if we don’t listen...And if they don’t listen...Why are we being the ones ridiculed for it? Because they make a scene? Because they hold the contradicting side of the argument? Or is it because they are willing to publicly disrespect our country?

Respect is an important word for all of these protests. Whether it be peaceful or whether it is taken further to a riot, respect is something that I am just not seeing from all of these folks.

I hate the fact that people are stomping on American flags, burning them, voicing their opinion and expecting us to say NOTHING. If we do, WE are wrong.

The flag is a powerful symbol for our country. It represents our freedom, and relevant to what I said before, it represents our freedom of speech. However, it is also a sign for those soldiers who have fought, still are fighting, and plan to fight for our country. There are soldiers who have died for them to be a representation of this freedom of theirs, and how are they treating it? Not with respect, I will boldly say that.

Law enforcement is also put in danger as they never know how far these protests will go… Many experience extended work hours, to protect US, we the people of the United States, which means that even the people who are protesting are being protected as well.

It’s as if we are at war with our own country.

And overall, if there is one thing our country must take away from these protests, it is that there needs to be a respect for those who are risking their lives for us.

Law enforcement, thank you for your service.

United States Military, thank you for your service.

America, thank you for our freedom. Let us learn how to use it the proper way.

Cover Image Credit: YouTube

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Things To Know, From a Gray-Asexual

Gray-asexual is often confusing, so here's some clarification.
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So, as some of you might know, I am Gray-Asexual. This is a form of asexuality that is noted by normally not experiencing sexual attraction towards others, but may experiencing it every once in a while. This is often misunderstood, as well as asexuality in general. So I’d like to clear somethings up.

1. Being asexual does not mean I am celibate.

Being asexual does not mean I am simply abstaining from having sex or simply haven’t found the right person yet. It means I do not experience sexual attraction towards others and I do not actively desire to have sex with others.


2. Being Gray-Asexual does not mean I am actually just heterosexual.

I have been told before that I am not actually a form of asexual. That I am a heterosexual with a low sex drive. This is unfair as it essentially demeans and erases my sexuality. I am asexual though, I also have (in the past once) experienced sexual attraction towards other, but don’t normally feel sexual attraction towards anyone in general.

3. Being asexual doesn’t mean I don't have a sex drive.

Being asexual does not mean you lack a sex drive. You can have a sex drive and be ace. You want to have sex, however, you don’t feel sexually attracted to anyone. It also doesn’t mean you can’t watch porn. You can watch it and enjoy it for the release it gives you, but nor feel attracted sexually towards others.

4. Asexuals come in many forms.

You have three different forms of asexuals when it comes to sex drive alone. You have Sex-repulsed asexuals, who are disgusted and have no desire to engage in sex. You have sex-neutral asexuals, who do not have positive or negative feelings towards sex, they simply don’t seek out to engage in sex, though they may engage in it at some points. And then you have sex-positive asexuals, they believe that it is healthy and normal to engage in sex, and even though they engage in it, they don’t really have sexual feelings/attraction towards others. Then you have different forms of asexuality, such as: asexual, demisexual, gray asexual, lithosexual, etc.

5. Being Asexual does not mean I don't experience romance

Being Asexual does not mean that I will not ever desire to have a girlfriend or significant other. I may one day seek out a romantic relationship. I may not. It is all up in the air and I don't know yet.

6. I am not broken.

That is something I've heard too many times about asexuals. That we are broken, because we don't desire to have sex. That we are some defective. That, in a sense, we are a lesser kind of human. All this, because we do not experience sexual attraction (or at least normally). We are told, at least I have, that I'm just a heterosexual with a low sex drive. That I will find the right person one day. That I am just confused and I'll get it figured out soon and find a nice girl to be with. That my sexual identity (which the Asexual Visibility & Education Network (AVEN) and even wikipedia recognize as real identities) don't exist. That I'm just making it up to be different. That I just want to be special. And it hurts, it makes me feel like a bad person. Like I'm broken.

7. One of the most helpful things I've been told on the internet, was by a stranger.

I had made a post in a forum about how I felt bad for identifying as gray asexual and that I was a bad person for identifying as it. And they gave me this helpful advice:

"Try to stop identifying yourself with a word or term. It is one of the biggest mistakes humans make. You are you. No need for a name or a title. The world around you is invaded with duality concepts because it causes disharmony and conflict. You will never find peace of mind when you participate in that nonsense. Just be you, offer yourself to others, love all - even the misguided , and reject the false system of mankind that tries to force everyone into a defined category."

What I got out of that was that I shouldn't care what others think of me. I should stop trying to live up to other people's standards and live my life as I see fit. I thank you, you kind stranger.



Cover Image Credit: www.io.wp.com

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Dear Beautiful Black Girl, Never Forget Your Worth

An ode to all the beautiful black girls.

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We live in a society where societal standards greatly define the way we view ourselves. Although in 2019 these standards are not clear cut, some things are not easy to change. Not to play the race card, but this is true for women of color, especially black girls.

As much as I'd like to address this to all women, I want to hit on something that I'm more familiar with: being a black girl. Black females have a whole package to deal with when it comes to beauty standards. The past suppression and oppression our ancestors went through years ago can still be felt in our views of beauty. It is rare to see young black girls be taught that their afros and nappy hair are beautiful. Instead, we are put under flat irons and dangerous chemicals that change our hair texture as soon as our hair becomes too "complicated" to deal with. The girls with darker skin are not praised, but rather lowered in comparison to their peers with fairer skin. A lot of the conditioning happens at a young age — at the age of 8, already you can feel like you're in the wrong skin.

As we grow up, there are more expectations that come here and there, a lot of very stereotypical and diminishing. "You're a black girl, you should know how to dance," "black girls don't have flat butts," "black girls know how to cook," "you must have an attitude since you're black" — I'm sure you get the idea. Let me say this: "black girls," as they all like to say, are not manufactured with presets. Stop looking for the same things in all of us. Black girls come in all sizes, shapes, colors, and talents. I understand that a lot of these come from cultural backgrounds, but you cannot bash a black girl because she does not fit the "ideal" description.

And there is more.

The guys that say, "I don't do black girls, they too ratchet/they got an attitude" — excuse me? Have you been with/spoken to all the black girls on this planet? Is this a category that you throw all ill-mouthed girls? Why such prejudice, especially coming from black men? Or they will chant that they interact with girls that are light-skinned, that is their conditioned self-speaking. The fact that these men have dark-skinned sisters and mothers and yet don't want to associate with girls that look the same confuses me. And who even asked you? There are 100 other ethnicities and races in the world, and we are the one you decide to spit on? Did we do something to you?

Black girls already have society looking at them sideways. First, for being a woman, and second, for being black, and black males add to this by rejecting and disrespecting us.

But we still we rise above it all.

Black girls of our generation are starting to realize the power that we hold, especially as we work hand in hand. Women like Oprah Winfrey, Lupita Nyong'o, Chinua Achebe, Michelle Obama — the list is too long — are changing the narrative of the "black girl" the world knows. The angry black woman has been replaced with the beautiful, educated, and successful melanin-filled woman.

Girls, embrace your hair, body, and skin tone, and don't let boys or society dictate what is acceptable or beautiful. The black girl magic is real, and it's coming at them strong.

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