At the time of beginning to write this, I am currently in my third day (second full day) of living in Aberdeen, Scotland. I have met some great new people and bonded with other students from Kalamazoo College, and I know this will be an adventure of a lifetime; I just can't help thinking, "What have I gotten myself into?" Don't get me wrong, the campus and the city itself are incredible and I actually can't wait for classes to start in a week (go figure)! It's just that I'm so far out of my comfort zone that I don't really know what to do with myself besides attending orientation meetings and following people I'm familiar with. This could be in part because of the jet lag (Aberdeen is five hours ahead of my hometown), but I know it's mostly because of my anxiety and the stress of pretty much being a freshman all over again. It's kind of like going through puberty twice, but with college. Know what I mean?
I just have to keep reminding myself that, no matter how stressed and anxious I feel, it's only day three of 100-something and I'll be settled in with a routine before I know it. I try to tell myself that once the first week of classes is over, I'll be golden. But why does that seem so far away? It definitely doesn't help that the school is currently in "Freshers' Week," which is basically an excuse for all the new students to have wild parties until 4:30 in the morning (I've never understood parties, not at all). At K, I'm used to quiet hours starting at 11pm on week days and 1am on the weekends, so I never felt sleep deprived because of noise. I like sleeping too much, so only getting four hours of sleep because of a party makes me grumpy and quite frankly a bit homesick.
I think I'll be okay, though. Once I know my way around and get used to the fact that I'll be living in a different country for four months, I'll probably forget most of the struggles I had after first coming here. Although I may be feeling some sliver of regret right now, these four months will be over before I know it and I probably won't want to leave (but I'll have to, because my visa only lasts for six months tops). Still, the end of the semester seems so far away right now. 100 days from now seems like 100 years. These first few days have been so long and it already feels like I've been here forever and that I'll stay here forever. For now, I just have to look forward to everything, do some traveling in between my studies, try things that I never thought I'd try. I don't know what's going to happen. I still can't believe I'm in Scotland...!