Growing up, I was definitely considering a "tomboy." I never liked the idea of cheerleading or constantly having my nails painted in pink. I always preferred being "one of the guys," and playing dodgeball, tossing a football, or just chasing each other in a game of tag. Not to brag or anything, but I could also talk about football since my dad did his best to educate me.
I also hated brushing my hair, for which my mom talked me into getting a pixie cut because I always refused to style it in the morning when getting ready for school. I swam and took taekwondo lessons, which required me learning how to punch and kick to defend myself. I also hated the idea of wearing dresses or a skirt because they just seemed uncomfortable to me. I wasn't your typical girl growing up, and I understand that. I actually embrace it.
I was the girl who also loved listening to Green Day and the Ramones because that's what my dad listened to. I loved wearing the color black because, for a while, Hot Topic was my favorite store (mainly because I could buy band tee shirts there). When asking what I wanted to be when I grew up, I thought of being a soldier like my dad. I didn't see myself being a "mother" as a career like most little girls in first grade.
Even though I don't remember my parents calling me a tomboy, it was how I identified myself. I only told people I was a "tomboy" because that's how my teachers and classmates in elementary school described me.
Now, looking back on it, I hate using the term "tomboy."
All it does is belittle young girls that they are always inferior to men, that masculinity is above femininity. I never want my daughter someday to believe she is weak and has to change. Gender is on a spectrum, and it should be celebrated as such.
I want my daughter to be celebrated as strong and powerful. I want her to go out for football if that's where her passion is, not just say no because that "isn't something that girls do." My daughter should be able to feel comfortable in her skin without feeling the need to have to conform to gender norms.
If she doesn't want to be a mother, great.
If she wants to wear baggy sweatpants and loose fitting tee shirts.
All I want for her is for her own happiness and to be comfortable in her body rather than feeling like she has to conform for people to accept her. Whatever passion or things she likes, as long as she is healthy and safe, that's all I should care about as her mother.
As her mother, I will embrace her for who she is rather than what she looks like. You don't have to be dressed "pretty in pink" to be seen as attractive. Looks aren't everything anyway. It is who you are on the inside that matters.