When a girl is first born, she is adorned with pretty, pink bows and soft, white onesies that symbolize her eternal innocence and delicate girlhood. She is raised on ethereal promises and poetic language.

The young toddler is spoon-fed fairy tales, while she dances around her house wearing tiaras and her mother's heels with her long hair flowing down her back. She is taught to believe that her home is a palace, the sacred place of protection where she is simply awaiting the arrival of her own Prince Charming.

The days drift by as the girl learns the importance of beauty with her first painstaking realization that perfection is the ideal art form of the twenty-first century. She hears of Cinderella's humility as the forsaken step-child and Princess Aurora's generosity as an accused member of society.

The little girl learns that she too must be humble and kind so that she will be worthy of her own prince. She's taught that through the proper behavior, a love is guaranteed. Her personality traits become tools to aid her in the challenging process of constructing the greatest romantic relationship possible.

But as she ages, she outgrows the baby food of her past that was so often spoon fed to her. She becomes an adult. She is no longer told that she should be waiting around for her Prince Charming.

This young woman is now clad in a dark business suit and is told to put her once flowing hair into a sleek, high ponytail. Her goal is no longer to be described by adjectives such as humble or generous.

She is taught to be independent, fierce, and strong. Her mother softly whispers the verb "conquer" into her ear, as the daughter rises from the small vanity where she spent the majority of her youth fantasizing about the eventual arrival of her prince.

As she delivers the intimate message that she swore to her ancestors she would share, her mother's voice is calm. Yet, it bears such an extreme amount of equanimity that it is frightening. This young woman is told to abandon all the hopes for a family that she was taught to cherish most in her childhood.

Suddenly, everything the little girl has grown to know as true realities is being taken away and replaced by opposite goals of a future life that is independent of the frailties of a potential romance. She is now taught that her career is the most valuable part of her identity. She is conflicted.

I remember attending a discussion my first semester at university that was being led by a mostly female class. I listened to the brilliant thoughts from some of the most powerful young women from my peer group that I had ever met.

On this particular day, we were discussing the idea of female empowerment. I attentively admired their perspectives on marriage, family life, and academic success. They explained the basic concept that it is perfectly okay for a woman to choose her own role in society, and decide whether or not she wants to enter into motherhood. They said it should be her choice.

I could not agree more.

However, when it was my turn to share my opinion on the empowered status of womanhood within our modern society and the hopes for my own role within this broad category, I experienced a strange feeling. I was too embarrassed to share my thoughts and individual aspirations.

I am not saying that this is a "strange feeling" because it is absolutely unthinkable that a freshman during their first semester of college would be afraid to share their thoughts in a setting of their peers for fear of being "wrong" or "judged." I am no fool. Many of us experience this hesitancy sometimes. It seems normal and natural to me.

However, I was not abashed at the act of simply sharing my thoughts because I was afraid of being looked at differently by classmates or seeming silly and wrong.

I felt embarrassed of myself because I realized society had conditioned me to be ashamed to represent my femininity in a way that differs from the mainstream view.

As I sat in this classroom and heard some of my smartest peers talk about defying traditional gender roles and choosing their career over their future role as a wife, I felt shameful because I often dream of being a dedicated wife and an incredible mother.

Yet, that does not mean that I do not dream of being a successful lawyer, as well. I want both dreams to be my reality. And, as I listened to these women focus on one aspect without considering the other for their own lives, I thought that's what I should be doing, too. I felt almost primitive and weak-minded for considering conforming to the more traditional elements of a woman's identity.

And in that moment, I fully acknowledged that the position of a woman is still a precarious situation that is misunderstood, even though our roles have undoubtedly evolved to allow for more opportunity. If I would have shared my thoughts, I am confident that my peers would have been understanding.

In fact, these women would have probably told me that I had a valid point that was reasonable. This just isn't the ideal lifestyle for them. But, I find it pressing that females are not told that they can achieve both versions of reality, and when they want to they seem unrealistic or overly dreamy.

I am not ignorant, I realize balancing a career, and raising a family is a difficult task. Yet, I believe that if we do not teach females from an early age that they have the opportunity to do both, they will accept defeat and think it is impossible.

As children, girls are told to wait for their "Prince Charming." They are socialized into the world with soft, pink toys and tiny, glittery makeup sets. They learn that Cinderella needs her prince in order to achieve happiness.

Then after they have aged, they are told to abandon these ideas. Cinderella does not need a prince in order to be happy. She can find happiness within herself, and relying on the prince makes her dependent.

Women should be told that "having a prince" does not make them weak or dependent. They can still have a career, and be happy with a significant other and wonderful family, as long as they express their own individuality and embrace self-respect.

I don't think women should be told that her empowerment can only arise from her ability to defy traditional gender roles and lead the business life of a man. I think she should also be taught that a woman can embrace her abilities as a potential mother or as a woman in general, while still having an auspicious career.

She shouldn't be deluded into thinking this is easy, however, she should be taught that it is possible with a careful amount of balance.

Most importantly, females shouldn't be embarrassed to express their own hopes for their roles as a woman. In 2017, society continues to dictate what happens to the female's body.

Even though she isn't forced into a role of motherhood that she doesn't want or isn't told to marry someone as the solution to her problems as she was in the past, she still is frowned upon for her individual choice of what she does with her body.

If a woman wants to be a housewife and have children, she should be allowed to do so without being judged. If she's aware of the other possibilities that exist, but still thinks this is the best idea for her, she should be supported. If a woman wants to be a career woman and doesn't want children, she shouldn't be frowned upon for defying her potential as a mother. She should be greatly admired for her commitment to her career. And if a woman wants to have both, she should be supported.

Women do not need to grow up with a conflicting reality of feminism. They don't need to be conditioned in childhood to wait for their prince. But, they also don't need to feel pressured into conforming to a total defiance of traditional gender roles, in order to be a feminist.

They need to be supported for their strength, which comes from the different ways they have to express their femininity and their incredible ways of doing so.