Farts Are Funny, Grow Up

I have been into comedy to some extent for as long as I can remember. I have always loved to make people laugh. Usually, I go for the witty comment that is fresh and can get as many people to chuckle as possible. Lately, I have been into more creative comedy. I love Twitter because so many accounts are relying on creating a funny visual using the small character limit. This form of sketch comedy is my favorite and it has led me to daydream about being a comedy writer for a living. Now, rather than elaborate too much on sketch comedy, I am going to talk about something else I find funny, no matter when or where: farts.

Farts are funny and always will be. They are comedy in its purest, biological form. They have everything. They are a noise, which is hilarious. They come from your body, so you can laugh at other people or they can laugh at you. And, to top it all off, they smell bad. Farts can be faked with other body parts like armpits, or masters will use their farts at-will to get a rise from an audience. True "fartsketeers" will be able to produce a “silent but deadly” one or a loud rumbler on command, regardless of what their digestive system is working with. That is skill. That is comedy.

Many will find embarrassment in farting. They try to hide it or hold it in, however, I liken farts to cursing. If you are old enough to understand their impact, and have good control over them, use them however you like! Just don’t do it in a fancy place, or with the intent of hurting someone with it. The only difference is that I do not fancy cursing in front of children, but I would gladly fart right in a child’s face, no questions asked. I would do it in Walmart with his mother right there watching. Wanna bet?

One of the saddest times of our life is the awkward stage from being pre-teen to about age 18 or 19. During that time, we find embarrassment in strange things. Middle school is probably the worst era for this feeling. We hide our handheld games and stash away old kid things that “aren’t cool anymore, Mom!” We try new fashion styles to show that we are nothing but hip. We become “not emo, goth! Now get out, MOM!” And I’m sure we would have found great humiliation in accidentally farting in class. You know, when a squeaker spontaneously ricochets off of the desk chair. But, you know what? Grow up. You’re an adult now. You have worked hard to get to where you are today. You deserve to fart wherever you want. Show off that Chipotle burrito you had last night. Bask in the warm aroma of curry and naan. Love yourself, inside and out, and let me love you, too.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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