An Open Letter to my Ex-Best Friend
Start writing a post

An Open Letter to the One That Refused to Stay

It hurt, but it was for the best

15
An Open Letter to the One That Refused to Stay
https://www.flickr.com/photos/112923805@N05/14707224807

Dear Ex-Best Friend,

Even that title sounds childish, but I don't know what else to call you.

No-longer-friend? The person that left me behind? The individual that refused to commit to the responsibilities of being "best friends forever?"

Did you ever really mean that? Forever? Did you ever truly have any intention of being there for me no matter what, or who, came into the picture?

Regardless, I feel weird calling you my "ex-best friend." It sounds extremely childish and, believe it or not, I don't have any bitter feelings left toward you, toward whatever it is that tore us apart.

In fact, I want to start this letter by saying that I hope you are doing well. I don't know what you're up to, how you're doing, or anything like that. I haven't heard or seen anything from you in literal years. It's so funny that, just four years ago, that even going a day without hearing from you would have been absolutely unheard of.

But I hope you are enjoying life and creating a future for yourself that is exactly what you always wanted.

Who knows, maybe that future never included me. Maybe I was always meant to be excluded from this point in your life, maybe that was your plan all along.

Yeah, it hurts to think about that way because I thought you had planned to be there for me for all of the landmarks in my life: My first boyfriend, my first kiss, my first day of college, my first day of college exams, my first presentation in front of a large audience. I wanted you there when I submitted my first paper to a big journal, wanted you there when I ultimately got rejected.

You were long gone at that point.

You fled from my life long before any of those opportunities even came into my field of vision, but I can't say that I would change anything.

You know, better than anybody, that I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. God has a plan for our lives and, even if it sucks at the moment, we just have to roll with the punches sometimes. I just want you to know that I hope you have rolled with your punches and lead a happy life since you walked out of mine.

Truly, I hope you are doing well.

Sure, I want to know why you decided to drop off of the face of the Earth and cut off all of your ties with me but, now that a couple of years have passed, I've decided that you just don't want me to know why you made that choice.

And I want you to know that I respect your right to keep that secret from me.

If I did something to upset you, I wish you would have told me....but I'm sorry.

If I stopped talking to you as much, it was because I was trying to be more present in my new environment once we left for college...but I'm sorry.

If it was something about a boy or anything like that, however, I'm not going to say I'm sorry. You know that I never wanted something petty like that to come between us and I really hope that wasn't what caused you to stop talking to me, to go quiet when I offered the advice you requested from me.

I promise, all I've ever tried to do is help you and if I hurt you in the process of trying to do so, I'm sorry.

Just don't expect me to apologize for trying to truly be there to help you as I promised.

Anyway, I hope your life is going well and I do wish you all of the best.

I hope you have found your friend group wherever you are. I hope you have found your way into a career field that pleases your interests. I hope you found the dream guy you always wanted.

I hope you're happy with your decision to take your bags and leave from my life.

As snarky as that all probably sounds, please understand that those are genuine wishes. I do wish the best for you, but there is a little bit of bitterness and confusion that rises back to the surface when I think about what you've done.

I'm just happy that we have gone our separate ways. My life feels so much lighter and so much more independent since starting college. Who knows, maybe that was just me growing up and broadening my horizons.

Maybe it was making the choice to accept the fact that I was freed from a toxic relationship.

Whatever the cause, I just want you to know that the choice was yours and we can both agree you made the best decision in leaving.

As for me, I have had others to take your place. Some of them chose the same path and that's okay. I've slowly started to accept the fact that not everyone you meet in life will like you (but that doesn't mean they're good for you). Others have stayed and brought so much more joy and happiness into my life and I hope these are the people that stay in my life for a very, very long time.

I hope you can say the same and I wish you the best in the future, but I think it's best to maintain the silence that your decision has created.

Sincerely,

Meagan

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

38530
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

22859
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

949353
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

126453
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments