Everything I Want To Say When You Are Hurting

Everything I Want To Say When You Are Hurting

I hope you’re feeling better and you're happy.
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I want to tell you I understand what you are going through, but I hate when people say that bullsh*t to me because how can someone ever truly feel what you’re feeling? I want to understand you though. I care about you and okay, I obsess over sh*t at times because maybe I have issues or maybe I care too much. But, I care about you.

I’ve felt very low at different points in my life and I always felt like a burden to my friends when I couldn’t deal with my difficult times on my own. I didn’t want you to feel like that. I wanted you to feel like you could take the time you needed, but I wanted you to know I’d be there for you if you needed anything. I was down to joke with you and laugh about stupid things.

Like I said, I always worry too much about everything. I was bossy towards my siblings when I was younger because I always wanted the best for all of them and I still do. I give people advice when they probably don’t want it because I want them to know I’m trying to put myself in their shoes by telling them how I would react to the situation. I want to try to understand everyone whether I can truly feel what they're feeling or not.

It'll be weeks before you read this, so I just want to say: I hope you’re okay. I hope the sun is shining where you are and I hope you’re happy. I don’t know if I’m writing this for just you, to put my feelings out there, or for us. I don’t know where things are going or if anything will ever work out, but I know that you make me laugh and I felt like I could be straight up with you about everything. I hope you’re feeling better and that you remember your worth like you always told me to.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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A Thank You To My Boyfriend's Family

Because you are so important to him, you are important to me.
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This one isn't easy to sit down and write because nothing I could say would do all of you justice in the way that I would hope I could. These are just words, but I hope that I am able to always show my thank you to you by treating him like the prince he is.

I can replay the moment of meeting each and every one of you all over and over in my head like it was yesterday. I was so extremely nervous every single time and I was trying to gather all the "right" things to say that would leave a good, first-lasting impression and that at the end of the day, you all would like me.

I think one of the most important basis and hopes in my relationship is that my significant other's family likes who I am. This is so important to me because whatever is important to him is equally important to me and your thoughts of me are crucial to our relationship.

The second I walked in the door, I was overwhelmed—overwhelmed with such a love. I had no idea at that point in time just how much you would all mean to me and how thankful I am for all of you!

Thank you for constantly making me laugh and feel at home.

Whenever I'm coming over for a family gathering or just to hang out, I know right off that I am walking into a world of laughter and good times are right beside that. You are all so entertaining and always have a good story to tell me. I can't name one time where I didn't feel like I was home.

And I appreciate the sweet, embarrassing photos and stories about my boyfriend that you all share with me! Even if it is by a photo, I have a glimpse of what his life has always been like thanks to each and every one of you individually.

Thank you for sharing your special moments in life with me.

You don't ever have to, but you invite me anyway. Whether it's just a family gathering, a birthday, or a holiday, I am thankful to have spent those times celebrating these moments in life alongside such amazing people. It's humbling and heartwarming to be a part of memories so unforgettable that you all share and that you have welcomed me to be a part of. They are days that I will never forget and have a place in my heart forever.

Thank you for always being there for him.

Since we have started dating, I have watched the way that you guys love him. I have watched the individual relationships and moments that you share with him make a difference in who he is. I have seen you all love and support him, no matter what he was doing.

With everything that comes along in life, this has been a simple reminder of an unconditional, loving, sacrificing family that is also the best support system. You are not only impacting him, but me, too.

Thank you for welcoming me in like your own.

Whenever you have to brave up and meet your significant other's family, I can say, for myself, that I didn't know what to expect. As I'm sure, none of you did when meeting me. Today, I catch myself wondering why I even worried in the first place. You all have welcomed me in your own ways and made me feel right at home. It is not always easy to do that with just anyone, but you have all taken the time to get to know me. And now I know that if I ever needed anything, I can call one of you.

Thank you for letting me date him.

I am most thankful for this. Thank you for sharing him with me and giving me a chance to show you all how important he is to me. I never thought that I would luck out and meet someone as special, kind, and wonderful as he is, but I did.

You have supported our relationship, given me a chance to love him, and welcomed me to new adventures in love and family. I have the upmost gratitude for each of you. You are the most wonderful, welcoming, and loving family. I am overjoyed to be able to experience just a glimpse of this life with him and with all of you.

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You Should Love Hard, But You Shouldn't Drive Yourself Crazy

Love can drive us nuts and make us do things out of character.

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Relationships are never easy. There is always this misconception that couples that are "meant to be" or friends who vibe well never struggle or fight.

The term "compatibility" is subjective, and it can take on many definitions based on different perspectives. Even the most compatible pair has their fair share of rough times, too, when they just feel like eliminating the other party's existence.

That may be exaggerative, but it's true. Been there, done that.

Sometimes, love is not enough to make a relationship work. Other fundamental elements like trust, mutual respect and commitment are necessary too.

They are the most precarious characteristics in this world. Once broken or lost, it will be an uphill battle trying to rebuild them again.

Most of the time, it will be a waste of time. It is extremely difficult to convince yourself to get involved with him/her again. You just want minimal or zero contact. I mean, trying to trust someone who broke your heart is always going to be tough no matter how much you still love them.

Starting over is way easier said than done.

As cliché as it may sound, love is a double-edged sword. On one end, you can have all the happiness and feel like you're on top of the world. On the other end, your feelings might not be reciprocated (and then come all the negative and crappy emotions).

What's certain is that if you are going to be emotionally stingy, be prepared to receive the same behavior from your potential partner. In any relationship, the unwillingness to share emotions is a form of emotional torture to both parties.

People who tend to be emotionally generous and show affections to their partners easily have a harder time when the relationship ends. Why is this so?

When you are loving without caution, you expose all your vulnerabilities to him/her. You're allowing him/her to have access to your inner world. You're loving hard, which undeniably should be the best way to love anyone.

But it got to the extent where you're almost driving yourself insane. You're so used to facing disappointment, and your heart has been shattered so many times you already lost count. You stayed despite knowing that he/she, on the other hand, would never go that far for you. You knew how calculative he/she was with giving love. You fought against yourself.

Was this really worth it?

You're pushing yourself into a corner for someone who just can't be bothered. You're constantly seeking him/her for closure. At times, you're just turned away.

This lack of clarity about why the relationship ended incurs greater pain and distress.

Loving hard is how love should be. I don't deny that. However, we still have to have control over our emotions.

You have already given your all. You have done more than enough to prove your love for him/her. What you should understand is that a person who left you in emotional despair would not be there for you, even if you both managed to reconcile.

Continue to wear your heart on your sleeve, but take accountability of your emotions. Love can drive us nuts and make us do things out of character.

If someone truly loves you and cares, he/she will never make you feel desperate or crazy. You will never have to beg for the closure that should be already given. Always bear this in mind.

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