Anyone who has studied even the most basic lessons on literature is probably familiar with the “weak woman” trope—the woman who cries often and sometimes even faints, the woman who at the proper age is transferred effortlessly from father to husband, the woman who apparently cannot brave the world outside the confines of her family home. Thankfully, these insulting and damaging stereotypes have largely been extinguished. Women are now achieving increased agency in relationships and in life overall, they are running marathons and powerlifting, and they are not letting other people walk all over them. In other words, women are wonderfully competent and the world is finally catching on to this fact.

This changing perception of women is a positive trend. However, it is still not a perfect perspective considering many of women still feel deeply and cry hard over ostensibly trivial matters, though oftentimes we feel we should be above such sentiments. Personally, I struggle as I balance self-perceived societal and familial expectations with my own emotions. On one hand, I often hope I come across as ambitious and strong, rightful descriptions that fit many women today. On the other, I have a personal weakness in that I have liked many boys and have experienced significant vulnerability as a result. Having a tendency to develop feelings for many of the guys one meets can lead to some heartache because when one is interested in a lot of guys, there will also be a decent amount of guys who will not return said interest for a multitude of reasons.

Oftentimes I am told (and with good reason) that I do not need to feel these emotions for a guy because I have so much more important things to concentrate on and celebrate including my grades, my future, my close-knit family, and my interesting and supportive friends. While encouraging, such sentiments frequently make me feel like I’m failing as a modern woman, stressing over some boy who more than likely will not matter to me in six months instead of standing up straight, shrugging him off, and focusing on the admittedly very fortunate aspects of my life.

However, I know that I and many others do not need to experience this internal conflict. Just because a woman is vulnerable and exposes herself to potential upset does not mean she is falling short of what today’s tough, empowered woman should be. In fact, many of the amazing young women I know are also vulnerable like myself, letting themselves break temporarily in the face of loss or rejection, and all of these women I see as very strong and capable. There are

so many female artists who express their vulnerability in beautiful and relatable ways, which I see as incredibly inspiring. Moreover, fully experiencing an upset, living through it, and successfully moving forward from it gives me a sort of emotional high as I experience a spike in my confidence and well-being.

I think in many respects we have not necessarily been freed from those clichés of how a woman behaves but rather that these stereotypes have simply changed to some extent. It is great that society now expects far more from women but, even still, it should be up to us to individually create these expectations for ourselves, and up to us to individually decide how we will go about fulfilling them for ourselves.