Easy Ways to Attract Good Men After Divorce

Easy Ways to Attract Good Men After Divorce

For those looking to find love again after a divorce, there are tips that can help you succeed
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Questions About Dating After Divorce Are Common. I just received an email from Sandra, one of my students, and it motivated me to write this post because I think Sandra’s question is a question lots of divorced women have when they start dating after divorce.

Sandra is a 47 year old divorced woman that wanted to start dating and felt like she didn’t know how to get started. She had been on a few dates but none of them really lead in the direction that she wanted to go, namely meeting a man that was serious about a long term relationship. It seemed that she was only meeting players and guys that were into head games.

The first step in the dating coaching session with Sandra was working on her attitude.

You got it, attitude comes first. Are you a single woman that is confident about yourself and clear on what you want? If not, it will show. Now I’m not talking about some ego centered false bravado.

To attract the good guys, you need to connect first with the core of who you are before you will ever connect with Mr. Right. It’s an inside out process.

Men who are players are experts at detecting a lack of self esteem or neediness in a woman. They know what buttons to push to get what they want…. Which is usually a roll in the sack and nothing more.

These guys know how to read your body language like a best seller and wrap you around his little finger. When you are around a man you are attracted to notice your posture, do you make good eye contact? Are you comfortable in your own skin? If not, you need to make it a priority to start to develop feelings of self confidence about yourself.

Learn To Get Comfortable In Your Own Skin

So, which single woman are you?

  • The confident woman makes eye contact and doesn’t avoid it.
  • She is comfortable about herself, she is ok being seen.
  • She has playful mysterious side to her.
  • She takes pride in the way she puts herself together and feels good about herself.
  • She expects a man to respond positively to her and commands respect without being demanding.
  • She doesn’t interrogate a man on the first date. She lets him talk and reveal himself in a very strategic, non-threatening way.
  • She knows how to engage him and keep the conversation flowing.
  • She is relaxed and isn’t in a hurry to Mr. Right.
  • She knows how to keep her emotions in check and is aware of noticing any red flags.

Her self confidence and attitude is paving the way for her to meet lots of quality men and will know with out a doubt when the man of her dreams appears.

So the first step when women after divorce wanting to attract good men, is to work on your attitude and develop your confidence and self esteem.

Cover Image Credit: Flickr

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An Open Letter To My Boyfriend's Mom

A simple thank you is not enough.
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Your son and I have been dating a while now and I just wanted to thank you for everything.

Wow, where do I start? Ever since the day your son brought me into your home you have shown me nothing but kindness. I have not one negative thought about you and I am truly thankful for that. I first and foremost want to thank you for welcoming me with open arms. There are horror stories of mothers resenting their son's girlfriends and I am blessed there is no resentment or harsh feelings.

Thank you for treating me like one of your children, with so much love but knowing exactly when to tease me.

Thank you for sticking up for me when your son teases me, even though I know it’s all in good fun it's always comforting knowing you have someone by your side.

Thank you for raising a man who respects women and knows how to take responsibility of mistakes and not a boy who is immature and doesn’t take responsibility.

Thank you for always including me in family affairs, I may not be blood family but you do everything you can to make sure I feel like I am.

Thank you for letting me make memories with your family.

There is nothing I value more in this world then memories with friends and family and I am thankful you want and are willing to include me in yours. I have so much to thank you for my thoughts keep running together.

The most important thing I have to thank you for is for trusting me with your son. I know how precious and valuable he is and I won't break his heart. I will do everything I can to make him happy. This means more than you could ever imagine and I promise I will never break your trust.

The second most important thing I must thank you for is for accepting me for who I am. Never have you ever wished I looked like another girl or acted like another girl. You simply love and care for me and that’s all I could ever ask. Every person in this world is a unique different person and understanding that means a lot.

The third most important thing I must thank you is teaching me how to one day in the future treat a potential girlfriend that I may interact with as a mother. I am not a mother, but I one day plan to be. If I ever have a son it is because of how you treated me that I am able to be a humble loving mother to this new face that could one day walk into my door. How you have treated me has taught me how I should one day be in the future and I thank you for that.

This may seem all over the place but that’s how my brain gets when I try and thank you for everything you have done for me. It’s all so much and even the little things are so important so I promise my scattered thoughts are all with good intentions and not meant to bombard you. I just want to get the idea across to you that you are important and special to me and everything you do does not go unnoticed.

Sincerely,

Your Son’s Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Christian Images and Quotes

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We Spend So Much Time Talking About How Much Men Suck In 2019, That We Forget Girls Are Just As Bad

I always talk about how awful guys can be, but let's take a second to talk about how awful my own sex can be, too.

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In our culture, we tend to place all the blame on guys in most relationships by saying how "all men suck" but what about girls?

Girls can be just as bad.

I'm constantly saying how bad guys can be but yet I never stop to analyze things I've done that weren't okay or things my fellow female friends have done that was awful.

I'm not innocent either, I've done some terrible things to really nice guys in my life.

There was one man in my life that genuinely cared for me and wanted to date me but I didn't feel the same at all and lead him on. I honestly didn't think I was leading him on at first but the minute I realized it I tried to nicely let him down. To this day I feel awful about it because I hurt him the way many other guys in my life have hurt me.

I tend to defend my own gender a lot in conversations and I now understand that I really shouldn't. I've seen so many of my female friends treat great guys terribly and have ignored it for so long because I want to believe that females can't be that awful. I was wrong.

I've had some of my best guy friends get treated like absolute garbage by girls that wanted to just party and partake in the hookup culture rather than be with a great guy. I don't get it.

If you have a great man that you're attracted to and loves you unconditionally why would you want to throw it away to chase after boys that won't remember your name the next day?

I've had to keep secrets for friends before that ate me up inside. I had a friend who cheated on her boyfriend by kissing another man in front of me and kept it quiet.

It is NEVER okay to do that to someone, especially a guy that truly cares about you.

It is NOT OK to be on dating apps while dating someone. If you are dating someone, you're exclusive. There is no need to continue talking to men that obviously don't want to just be your friend. There is no good excuse and if you have to try and justify it to yourself, then it's probably not a good idea.

I honestly made myself believe that females didn't play the games men play with our hearts, but we can be just as bad if not worse than a lot of men.

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