This article was originally supposed to be my "8 Favorite Beyoncé Songs" listicle. While I love Queen B, the idea had to be thrown out; Beyoncé, I'll write about you next week, but tonight I dedicate this article to college. So much has been on my mind recently relating to this wonderful institution.
Hey college, how's it going? Well, I'm not doing so well. Throughout this wonderful journey, it's been rough. The past three years haven't exactly been a walk in the park; it's been more like walking a little bit, then tripping, getting up, then tripping again and finally getting up. (Bruises and dirt all around.) I'm not sure if that made sense, but, if you're in college, you'll get it.
I've experienced every emotion possible while attending college. Some days I'm radiating with happiness, motivated to take on the day. Other days, it's hard to wake up and attend class or start assignments. Life can feel difficult, hard to get through and you just want to say, "See ya later" to this whole college thing.
You know that thing you say when school is getting EXTRA rough and you just want to stop everything and leave: the notable "I'm literally just going to drop out." I thought about it way too many times in the past three years. I've got through two years of school, which makes two more years of sleepless nights and dread ahead.
I grew up with the notion that college is important and I'll only be successful with a college degree. Steve Jobs created Apple, a technology behemoth, and did so without a college degree. Mark Zuckerberg created Facebook, the platform that all parents and relatives love to post horrible pictures on, without a college degree. If they can do it, why can't I? In fact, Queen B, builder of an entire music empire, did it all without a degree, too. But, I am no Jobs or Zuckerberg or Yoncé.
There's been one thought circulating my mind recently: is college right for me? Honestly, I'm not completely sure what I'll do with my degree when I finish college. The world outside of college is so scary, but the world inside college is equally stressful and depressing. One thing I can't imagine doing is sitting in an office from 9-5 for the rest of my life. There's so much the world has to offer and maybe it's not offered through college.
I've thought about legitimately dropping out recently or taking a semester off and rethinking my academic life. This would be the first time I would take a break from school and all to wonder about what I really want to do. I know my major, but what do I want to do with it? Or maybe I should stick through this and just get my degree. I start thinking that there are people in the world who dream of attending school and here I am complaining about the experience.
The journey has been rough and whether I drop out, take a semester off, or keeping trudging through, college will always be on my mind. College, I love and hate you, but will I do without you. You keep me on my toes, make me cry and wonder if I'm really meant for this place. Wherever my journey takes me, college or no college, I have hope for the future. The present is kinda scary, but the future is bright, right?