One of my favorite movies growing up was "A Cinderella Story" with Hillary Duff.
It's set up like any other spin-off Cinderella story with the basic plotline: dad dies and the girl is left with her evil step-mom and sisters. However, what makes this version a one-of-a-kind is the motivation Sam (Duff) finds from her dad even though he's gone with the one thing he always told her before his passing: "don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game".
Lately, there have been many articles and publishings about how the younger generations having high levels of anxiety. Due to this, students are missing class, children are skipping out of social events, and, in general, people have just stopped going for it. They keep allowing the fear of striking out keep them from doing things.
Now, those with anxiety out there reading this may be thinking I'm here to condemn you because "I just don't get it". However, that is not the case. I get it, I struggle every day with anxiety. I deal with my heart racing, chest-tightness, shaking, feeling like I can't physically make my body calm down and the constant thoughts of "what if, what if, what if" and thinking of the absolute worst scenarios of what could go wrong. And it's random. I never know when it's going to hit.
However, growing up my parents didn't just allow me to not do things because it made me uncomfortable. Yes, when they made me do things I didn't want to do, I freaked out on the inside, but I didn't let my freakout stop me from disobeying my parental units. And even though certain tasks are extremely hard for me, I am grateful that my parents pushed me because it taught me not to let a mental health disorder rule my life and how to learn to embrace it, not fear it.
My junior year of high school, I took a speech class. It was the most terrifying class I have ever taken in my entire life. Public speaking creates so much anxiety within myself and caused an unhealthy amount of self-criticism. I really wanted to drop the class because every single thing I am self-conscious about was going to be put on display for an entire class of 30 to see.
However, my teacher was amazing and really helped with talking about how uncomfortable it is to speak in front of a class. And though I struggled with speaking way too fast (I once did an eight-minute speech in three minutes to give you a reference on how bad the anxiety was for me), by the end of the class I learned to embrace my racing heart, my speaking fast, and used it as an advantage instead of a disadvantage.
In a way, that class helped me to be a little bit more outgoing, speak up in class, and more fearless because I knew how to let my anxiety be my friend. I know how to deal with the "symptoms" of anxiety in a healthy manner so that I can present my presentation, I can go to that party, I can speak my mind, and so much more.
However, I think the issue with the youth and even 20-somethings today is that people are ignorant to the stress anxiety can bring and control over someone's life that they ignore the issue rather than figuring out how to deal with the issue. I am aware there are some cases of anxiety where it physically makes people sick and if that's you, do not be afraid to reach out and get help.
For those out there who deal with anxiety, here are some of the coping mechanisms I use to combat the side effects (if you will) of anxiety:
1. Chest tightness: take long, deep breaths and do positive self-talk, either out-loud or in your head. Say things like "I am okay", "I am healthy", "This is just a side effect of my anxiety", and so on.
2. Not being able to sit still: Warm yourself up. Anxiety causes our muscles to tighten up, which causes the shaky feeling. Avoid cold environments because it will make the shakiness worse. Either put on a jacket, grab a blanket, your favorite warm clothes, a heater, or if available, take a nice warm bath or shower. Your heart rate is also up, so read on to number three in the event you can't get warm.
3. Racing heart: Again take slow, deep breaths. Avoid caffeine (sodas, coffees, energy drinks, etc...). Sometimes laying down and taking the deep breaths helps a little more.
4. Overthinking: Talk it out with someone who you know will ground you and bring you back to reality. I know for me, my anxiety derives from over-thinking and analyzing situations. My mind, like many, goes into the "what if?" mindset and I get worked up about situations that didn't even happen and I want to avoid the situation altogether just in case the outcome I created in my head happens–which nine out of ten times won't actually happen. If you go into the "what if", talk to someone about the what if's and go through each scenario with them because somewhere in the thinking there's an extreme that's not plausible.
There are some cases of extreme anxiety where these methods do not work and that is okay. If these methods do not work for you, do not be afraid to reach out to someone at your school, your job, a friend, or family member. There are more resources and people out there who are willing to help you than you realize. For those who try these techniques and it works for you, don't be afraid to still go out and reach out to someone. We are all human and even Superman needs a little assistance at times.
Anxiety is a real thing and it can impact your life greatly. Learn to live with your anxiety and embrace it, it is not your enemy and it does not have to control your life. Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.