"You have to love yourself first."


Is loving yourself important? Absolutely, extremely so. Self love if one of the most important aspects of life. However, I am here to tell you that contrary to popular belief, I actually do not have to be whole in order to love or be loved.

What? How can she possibly say this is true?

Because my friends, I myself am living proof.

The truth is we are ALL broken people living in a broken world. Yes, I said it. None of us, not a single one of us, are whole. And that, that is okay.

You do not have to have all your ducks in a row to experience love. For some reason society has convinced us that our brokenness is something that must be kept secret, something we should be ashamed of, something that must be fixed before we can allow ourselves to experience love.

But what if.... what if the only antidote that exists with the power to heal our brokenness is the power of love?

So you see the dilemma?

If we withhold the magic that is love from all those who are not whole, that is like withholding the cure to cancer from all those who have cancer.


Starting to make more sense? Want to know what is even crueler than withholding the cure to cancer? Withholding love from all those who are broken.

Because, you see my friends, we are all broken. None of us are whole. And if we live by this unrealistic standard that we must have it all together before we can have love, then we will be living in an incredibly empty, lifeless, and loveless world.

This is the paradox of society's unrealistic standards, on love. We tell the world you mustn't experience love until you are whole, but we know that you cannot be whole until you experience love.

Ludacris, would be an understatement.

So I propose this; that no matter who you are, no matter where you are in your journey of life, no matter how broken or whole you may be, you still deserve and are worthy of love.

If I must wait until I'm whole to love and be loved, then I will always, always, be broken.

Love is the only thing LOUDER. The one and only thing.

Louder than what?

The voices that tell us we are not good enough. The feelings of worthlessness. Louder than any screams from our demons. Louder than any amount of brokenness.

Love is, has been, and always will be the answer; to everything. Love is the most healing thing this world has to offer. And every one of us, every single person... deserves to be fully enveloped by this love.

If we withhold love from those who are broken, we will never be whole.

So tell me again, "you have to love yourself or no one else will" or try to tell me "you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else."

And I will tell you this. Yes, I need to love myself. And I will. It is a journey, a lifelong one. And I get closer each and everyday to loving who I am to the most extreme degree.

But in the mean time...My brokenness does not equal incapableness to experience love. In fact, I am filled to the brim with love. Love that I can and will pour out onto this world. And I am fully capable of accepting love from others no matter how hard it is sometimes, and with every ounce of love I receive and give, I heal a little more, bit by bit, and my broken pieces are being mended back together into a beautiful working of self love.

The truth is...

We accept the love we think we deserve.

And I do not know about you, but I am sick and tired of letting society convince me to think that I do not deserve any love at all. Because I do. I deserve love now, just as I am, and so do YOU.

We accept the love we think we deserve.

And I think, I think it is about time that you and I realize that we ARE worthy of love and not just any love, but the most beautiful kinds of the magic that is; love.

We are broken people, living in an incredibly broken world. BUT, we are not without hope. Love is our hope. And love is unconditional and unfailing, at all times.

Love should NOT be withheld from the broken and saved only for the whole. For love is what creates the whole. Love transforms the broken, and makes them new.

There are no standards, no limitations... to love. Love is for all. Love is for you. Love is for me. And LOVE..... love will set us free.