I find myself oftentimes making a plan for all aspects of my life. My career, my love life, my extracurriculars, how I'm going to interact with people. No matter what it is, I usually start to daydream about how my interactions are going to go. And I think that this is normal. No matter who we are, all of us at some point have played out scenarios in our heads, imagining the ideal situation or the worst case scenario so that we can prepare ourselves for what is to come. Well, I'm here to stay stop.
We can't force interactions. We can't force careers. We can't force relationships. If a job isn't right, then something better will come later. If a person wants to leave you, then let them. I am honestly tired of all the romanticizing that occurs in relation to "fighting" for relationships when in retrospect is essentially forcing what is not meant to be. Do not idealize situations in your head. Do not play scenarios over and over ago. What will be, will be. That is the end of it. If we continuously spend our days daydreaming, we will miss what is occurring right in front of us.
Something that my best friend says a lot is that it is a two-way street. It doesn't matter what you apply it to. If it's a job, then it's a two-way street because you have to love your job but your job has to love you right back. If it's a relationship, you have to put in the effort but your partner has to put in the effort as well. Take a step back and think about the relationships in your lives. Whether they be platonic or not. Why haven't some of them worked out? Why did some relationships never come into existence? Why are some of your relationships in turmoil right now? Because it is a two-way street.
Take it from me, I learned this the hard way. You can never force someone to stay if they want to leave. If they want to go, they will go no matter how much fighting and begging you do. And even if they stay, they will have one foot out the door. You can never force someone to stay if they want to leave.
Find someone, something, somewhere that never wants you to leave. Be appreciated, respected, cared for. Make sure to appreciate, respect, and care for in turn.