In life, things happen, hopefully good things, but sometimes bad things.
I wish I could protect everyone. I wish bad things didn't happen. I wish I got to the point in life where I comprehended that I don't have any control over anything that will happen. My impossible wish in life would be that I wish people lived forever. I wish bad things didn't happen.
I can't stop my loved ones from driving their car, but I worry there might be a fatal car accident. I can't tell them not to go on a plane because it may crash. I can't tell them to quit their job because they work at a school, in fear there might be a school shooter. I can't stop these protecting thoughts, because I want them all to live forever.
It might be selfish of me, but I don't want to live in a world without my mom or my brothers.
I don't think I would ever be able to make it through that mess. It is incredibly selfish of me, but we all have been through a hard death, and that death will make you question why it wasn't you.
I want to be able to protect everyone, I want bad things to not happen but they do. I don't want to live in fear with everyone who I love, but it happens, I worry all the time. I experienced too much unexpected death in my life, so if someone goes to the hospital for a simple procedure, I treat it as it is an open heart procedure.
I worry way too much. At 18 years old, I probably should be out partying, making decisions I could later regret... But always, at the end of the day, when my head hits the pillow at night, I think of everything and every possibility.
I did learn life is not all sunshine and rainbows, and there will be hardships you stumble across.
As much as I wish bad things didn't happen, there is nothing I can do to prevent it. I would take a bullet for any of my family members in a second.
I love all my family to death, and I do wish I can protect everyone. I just pray that nothing bad happens and everybody lives healthy and happy.