To those who honestly suffer from depression, you all know that for lack of better words, it sucks. It's like seeing the world in grey while everyone else is seeing color. It's feeling like you're drowning while weirdly still being afloat. It's basically struggling to stay alive while being physically perfectly healthy. It's a daily, heck, minute by minute battle, with different versions of dealing with it.

Many find that going out with friends eases their suffering and helps them forget. Others find comfort in self-care, like face masks and lots of calming bubble baths. Some love curling up with a good book. However, depression has many faces, and I feel that only one side is shown and accepted.

If you're depressed, it's okay, as long as you take care of yourself. But sometimes, depression doesn't allow you to take care of yourself. It's not always sloppy but cute buns, soothing lotions and long hot showers. What about other people, who struggle with even getting out of bed? Are they still viewed as people? What about the people who don't brush their hair for weeks? What about the people who struggle to bathe themselves, or change their clothes?

Sometimes you just can't get the energy to change. There will be holes in your clothes that still fit you because you binge eat, but you do not have the energy to get new clothes. Sometimes your hair stays in the same bun for days or weeks, because what's the point? It sucks being on this end of the mental illness stick, and it's embarrassing to open up about. It's almost like, it's okay to be depressed, but only if you take care of yourself and still look pretty. It's not always like that.

It sucks when your friends don't talk to you anymore because you don't text them as often as you should because you just can't. Sometimes you want to sleep, but you just can't. You want to be positive, but there's just too many clouds. I want to tell anyone who is going through this, that it's okay to depressed and sleep all day, or not sleep. It's okay to be depressed and self-care with face masks and bath bombs, and it's okay to not have the energy to even brush your hair. It's okay to isolate and let your appearance go. It's ok to wear whatever you want.

I know it's hard, because in this day in age, social media has romanticized and glorified this illness, making you think you're only valid if you still shower every day, or only if you still check up on all of your friends. It's okay if you can't get out of bed for days. I'm so proud of you if you even get up and just brush your teeth. Do not feel worthless because your friends spend hundreds of dollars a month on hair and face products while you can barely open your window. You are still strong. You are still a beautiful soul. I am so proud of you all who aren't giving up, and you're still here. You're all amazing in my eyes. You are valid, and you are worth it. Don't you dare let this disease tell you otherwise.

Depression is not pretty. It's not a choice. Do not shame ANYONE struggling with this, or how they deal/don't deal with it. Thank you very much.