Hi, it's me and I've got a pretty long list of stuff I'd like to have this year. I know you're just a dude with some kind of magic powers and not a miracle worker, but maybe you can still help? I promise I've been extra good this year and all of that stuff. I've only watched Netflix when I was supposed to be working some of the time instead of all of the time and I haven't asked for a single deadline extension on my homework. And you know I've studied really hard for all of my exams. Well, fine, maybe not all of them, but enough of them, right? Okay. Here goes, my Christmas list:
1. A higher GPA
I know I shouldn't be greedy because my GPA is already decent, but I would really, really, really like for it to be a *little* higher than it is. Somewhere in the 3.7-4.0 range would be really nice.
2. Gas cards
You know as well as I do that I have to drive a lot and gas can get expensive. Some loaded gas cards would be pretty cool, Santa. I mean, how am I supposed to be home for Christmas without them?
3. Starbucks gift card
Santa, friend, I am a college student. All we do is drink coffee and wish we could sleep, but good coffee isn't cheap, so maybe you could hit me up with a gift card to Starbucks?
4. More hours to sleep
Santa, I swear that I'll be asleep when you come to give me all of this stuff because I finally won't have to stay up and do assignments. But if you could figure out how to add a couple more hours to each day that were to be used exclusively for sleeping, that would be pretty great.
5. Cheaper Netflix
Okay, Santa. So Netflix is continually getting more expensive, which isn't cool. But I can't college without it. So maybe you could get them to lower the price of it? Please?
6. Canceled finals
Santa, if you could get my finals canceled, I would be willing to do anything you asked. taking out the exams takes out my stress, which means that I can properly celebrate the Christmas season without feeling guilty that I'm not studying.
7. Less homework
While we're on the subject of reducing stress, if you could lighten the workload, that'd be nice. Even just a teensy bit less homework every week would help a lot.
8. Free food
Santa, I love food, as I'm sure you do too. But getting really good food is kind of expensive. Not to get too greedy here, but I was wondering if you could just make food free for students?
9. A gym bod without actually going to the gym
Okay, Santa, I bet you can relate to this one. No one on college-earth has the time it takes to go to the gym regularly every week and work toward being healthy. And even when they do, no one really feels like it, so my request for you, pal, is that we could all somehow have gym bods without actually going to the gym.
10. A dog
Since a dog can be kind of a lot for a college student though, maybe you should include some extra time to be able to take care of it?
11. A job/money
Santa, if we're being real, several of the problems listed here could be fixed by one simple thing: a large paycheck. So really, the best gift for me would be a job that requires a relatively low amount of work but pays somewhere around six-figures a year. That's completely feasible, right?
Santa, I know that this list is kind of a tall order, but I also know that you're the Santa Claus. You can make it happen. You could set them under the tree or in my stocking or it could just magically appear in front of me somewhere random - whatever works best for you. I'll even do the whole milk and cookies thing - I'm finally old enough to bake the cookies for you myself, so keep that in mind.
Thanks, Santa, and see you soon!
A typical college student