Dear J.O.N.,

I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about you from time to time.

There are moments when I go from "Someone Like You" to "Send My Love (To Your Lover) in ten seconds and back again. I go from missing to you to being happy you're out of my life and back again.

Love is never easy to get and it's not even close when you have to let it go.

And it sucks. It sucks because I really fell for you. I fell for you so hard I cracked my skull and heart open. I thought you were the one. You awakened something inside me others never had before and probably never do again.

Do you ever think of me? Do you ever think of us? Do you ever think of what we could have been? I could have been the love that you had been looking for. I could have been everything you wanted and needed in a life partner. But I guess we will never know now.

It's Just our never-meant-to-be.

I heard you found someone new.

And that they are very good to you. But do they love you like I used to do? Do they make you feel the way I used to? Do they even know you like I know you? Probably not because only I really know they real you which is why we aren't together anymore.

I hope they are everything you wanted and needed. I don't want to be fake and say "oh that's nice" because let's be honest,

I'm not really happy for you but I can't let you know that.

I guess it just wasn't meant to be.

My heart hasn't been the same since we parted ways. My heart still yearns for you every day and every night. I wish you were here to talk to and here to hold on to. I wish we hadn't said good-bye but I guess it's just our never-meant-to-be.

We will never be the same again. We can't even be friends. Had to be the asshole but you broke my heart and I can't be friends with someone like that. You loved me in ways more than I can say but you also hurt me in ways more than I can say.

I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope they hurt you just as bad as you hurt me. I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope they bite your lip everytime you two kiss. Hope they forget to call you on your birthday. Hope the sex is so bad not even faking it is an option. I hate to be the asshole but let's face it...

It's Just our never-meant-to-be.

Please understand my heart still needs time to heal. It needs time to find another again. Theses feelings are just speed bumps on the road to recovery. It's going to be a long way to happy. I could write a thousand poems, sing a thousand songs, eat several carts of ice cream. And it still won't erase my feelings for you.

You know what they say.

You never forget your first.

Even if it was...

Never meant to-be.