Dear Granny, words can't explain the pain I am feeling right now. My heart literally aches; it is broken. I miss you grandma so much. I miss your beautiful smile even when you didn't have teeth. I miss your voice when you would sing oh how it gave me chills. I miss going to see you and you falling asleep, and when I would call you out on it you would say "I'm just resting my eyes". You had such a great sense of humor.
I miss how every year on your birthday you would turn "25". The day you died a piece of me left with you. I try to keep myself busy, so I want to think about it, but honestly no matter how busy I keep myself I could never not think about it.
I am so thankful for all the lessons you taught me. You always told me to spend as much time with my papa as I could, but you never told me I needed to spend just as much time with you. Thank you for raising my dad into the man he is today. I know we are supposed to love God and trust him no matter what, but I can't help but to feel upset with him I honestly thought you would live forever. When I came home during the summer that year and you announced to us that you had cancer again, my heart completely sunk to the floor. You told us to try not to worry about you, but honestly, how could we not?
I promise I'll try to be the best person I can to make you proud. It made me so happy to know that the grandchildren you raised are on the road to success. I miss calling you and the Sunday visits. I miss the millions of questions you would ask me because it let me know you were concerned. I haven't been down to the house since your funeral. I know I should go and see granddaddy, but I can't bare the pain of going there knowing you weren't going to be there.
I wish I could just talk, hug, and kiss you one more time. You've always told me anything easy isn't worth having. You are the strongest woman I know next to my mom. You would tell me stories that taught me life lessons about how LOVE covers a multitude of sin. Thank you for teaching me what forgiveness is. I love your willingness to help others no matter what. Thank you for teaching me to be resilient when I go through hardships. I can't repay for all the time and love you gave to me. You never would say I was your favorite, but I knew I was.
Apart of who I am today is because of who you were. Thank you. I miss you.