Dealing With Things You Can't Control

Dealing With Things You Can't Control

It may be hard to handle, but we have to have hope that it will get better and it is all for a reason.

We've all had a situation in our lives that we wish we could control or change, but we know it's out of our hands. Maybe it was a breakup that you didn't want to happen, a health problem, the loss of someone close to you, etc. Circumstances that you can't change. Obstacles thrown your way that are gonna happen no matter what you do. It's hard no doubt, but unfortunately it's a part of life.

Whatever you believe in, we have to have hope that things will get better, or what would be the point in pushing through the hardships every day? For some of you, that may be that everything happens for a reason. Whatever you're going through now is going to lead to something better. For me, my hope is in the fact that I believe God has a plan. I believe He puts these hardships in my life for a greater purpose. Everything I go through is to make me stronger, change the direction I'm taking in life for the better, or lead me to my purpose here on Earth.

It is nice to have hope. It gives us a reason to get out of bed, a reason to continue working hard and caring, a reason to keep going. But sometimes life can seem hopeless. I mean, have you ever felt like the old saying "when it rains it pours" was very true and all about your life? Have you ever felt like suddenly everything that could go wrong was going wrong? Or that you don't deserve what you're having to go through? When you feel like this, it's hard to find hope. It becomes easy to just give up, to wallow in your self pity, and to believe that you have it worse than anyone.

It is especially hard to deal with when you can't do anything to change it. The cancer that has no cure, the family member taken too soon, the sickness that debilitates you and won't heal, the person that doesn't love you.


We have to remember two things:

1. There is most likely someone out there that has it way worse than you. As much as your life seems to suck right now, there is most likely someone who has it worse. We have to be grateful for the blessings we do have that others don't.

2. There is a reason for all of this. Whether that boyfriend who broke up with you needed to be out of your life even though it hurts, or you didn't get that job because a better one is coming, there is a reason. Even if that reason is that all of what you're going through is going to make you so much stronger.

I know it's hard. It would be so much easier to think about how bad you have it and be miserable, but we can't. To get through this life, I have to believe that God has a purpose for all the bad. It is so much easier to get through things knowing He is holding my hand through it all, leading me to the much greater plans He specifically drew out for me.

So whatever you're going through, keep your head up. Find your hope in God, or at least find your hope in the fact that this is all happening for a reason. That is a purpose for all the chaos. You will make it through.

Cover Image Credit: Flickr Creative Commons: Yaniv Izhaki

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I Woke up In The Middle Of The Night To Write About My Fears, They're Worse Than The Dark

One minute I'm thinking about what I want to do after college next thing I know I'm remembering the time I tried talking to a boy and choked on my spit.


It is one of those nights when I am tired, but for some reason, I can't seem to fall asleep. So, what do I do? I pull out my laptop, and I begin to write. Who knows where it will lead. It could lead to a killer article or something that does not make sense. I mean it is almost 2 A.M. In my mind, that's pretty late.

Anyways, let's do this thing.

Like many people, thoughts seem to pile up in my head at this time. It could be anything from a time when I was younger to embarrassing stories to wondering why I am "wasting" my time somewhere to thoughts about the future. All of these things come at me like a wildfire. One minute I'm thinking about what I want to do after college next thing I know I'm remembering the time I tried talking to a boy and choked on my spit.

The thought that is going through my mind as I write this is about the future. It's about the future of my fears. Let me explain. I have multiple fears. Some of my fears I can hide pretty well, others I am terrible at hiding. My fears may seem silly to some. While others might have the same fears. Shall we start?

1. My career

I don't know where to begin with this one. For as long as I can remember, my consistent dream job has been working in the world of sports, specifically hockey. A career in sports can be and is a challenging thing. The public eye is on you constantly. A poor trade choice? Fans are angry. Your team sucks? "Fans" are threatening to cheer for someone else if you can't get your sh*t together. You can be blamed for anything and everything. Whether you are the coach, general manager, owner, it does not matter. That's terrifying to me, but for some reason, I want to work for a team.

2. My family

Julie Fox

Failing with my family, whether that be the family I was born into or my future family, it terrifies me. I have watched families around me fall apart and I have seen how it has affected them. Relationships have fallen apart because of it. I have heard people talk about how much they hate one of their parents because of what happened. I don't want that.

3. Time

This could be a dumb fear. I'm not sure, but I fear time. With every minute that passes, I am just another minute closer to the end. With every day that passes that I am not accomplishing goals or dreams I have, I am losing precious time. It scares me to think of something horrible like "What if I die tomorrow because of something horrific?" or even worse, "What if I don't make it through today?" It's terrible, I know.

4. Forgetting precious memories

When I was younger, I had brain surgery. It is now much harder for me to remember things. I am truly terrified that I am going to forget things I will want to hold close to me forever, but I won't be able to. I am scared I'll forget about the little things that mean a lot. I'm afraid of forgetting about old memories that may disappear. I'm worried that I'll forget about something like my wedding day. That might seem out of this world, but it's a reality for me.

5. Saying "goodbye"

I hate saying bye. It is one of my least favorite things. Saying bye, especially to people I don't know when I'll see again, is a stab in the heart for me. I love my people so much. I love being around them. I love laughing with them. Thought of never having a hello with them again scares me beyond belief.

6. Leaving places that I love

Alright, let me start off by saying this- it takes a lot for me to love a place. It has to feel like home. It has to make me feel comfortable. It has to be a place I can go to and be myself. Thankfully, I have had and still have multiple places that are like that. I have also had places I could not wait to leave. I think that's why leaving places I love is so hard and something I fear so much. I am afraid I'll never get that place "back", for lack of a better term. I guess, I'm trying to say, it's like a piece of me is leaving as well.

These six things are just the start of my fears. Some of these might seem "dumb" or "ridiculous" to you, but for me, it's my life. These are the things that I think about the most. These are the things that feel like a pit in my stomach. These six things are parts of my life that mean a lot to me.

Cover Image Credit:

Emily Heinrichs

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Short Stories on Odyssey: Don't Shine for Me

At a certain point, trust is lost.


She walked along, and she listened to how the rose petals fell behind her, beside her, in front— where she could see the red love.

"We love you! We just love you, and love you," they said.

She smiled, and she felt the webs inside her fall and the dust brush off the shelf and everything shine like the sun on the stars in the most un-cliché way she could imagine.

She reached for the sun and for those stars that claimed they loved her and watched as they stopped shining, and they turned to sick, black rubble that fell on her face and suffocated her heart.

The rubble turned to glass and cut her, drawing invisible red blood that spilled in the night when she wanted to sleep and spilled in her mind during the day when she needed to think.

"Can you please, please, just apologize? I just want to hear you say sorry— all I really want is for you to tell me exactly what I already know. Can you do that for me?"

But the stars just hugged her again, and they embraced her, and they shone a path that she tiptoed on. Through rivers, she passed, until the glass fell from her skin and trickled down with the river, faster and faster, and then not at all.

"I don't trust you. You say you love me, but you don't. And you act like you care, but you can't, I mean, how could you, when I can see that you don't and you won't?" she asked.

The stars didn't respond for a while. They didn't apologize, and they didn't give her any sign that they would shine for her forever.

So she trudged along the river, slowly, bit by bit. And soon, she met up with the pile of glass that was waiting for her along the way. It cut her so deep, and she lay bleeding in the river.

The stars made her blood glisten even brighter in their light, and she closed her eyes, aware that the river stopped running. She closed her eyes for such a long time that the webs and the dust returned, and her heart grew old and grey.

She lay silently, for eternity, until finally, she slowly pricked the glass out of her skin, and she was able to brush her hair back and open her eyes.

"Can you please, please, make sure you never shine for me again...Ever?" she asked.

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