Dating is scary enough as it is. You only have two choices when you date somebody. You either will marry that person, or you will split up. With those odds, you might as well fold while you can. When you throw in social medias and the patterns of the millennial generation, you might as well quit while you are ahead.
Now, don't get me wrong. Dating is a wonderful thing. However, it is unfortunately dead. With the up-rise of online dating and the gray lines between ‘dating’ and ‘talking’, there is a large discrepancy on how to date, whether you even should date, and if you are even dating.If you are in the millennial dating game, you have probably said one of the following phrases: ‘We are just friends,’ ‘We are hooking up,' 'We are a thing,’ ‘We are just talking.’
With these gray lines and odd dating trends, the idea of dating is essentially null and void. Before we get too far, we should attempt define some of the odd dating trends.
Talking: When you are “talking” to somebody, it means you are texting them with the potential interest of going further but nothing is set in stone, so you shouldn't have too high of expectations.
Ghosting: When you are ghosting somebody, it means you are ignoring their texts because you don’t know how to end whatever it is you have.
Rebound: A rebound is when you get out of a relationship, and jump to the next person you see to date,hookup with, etc. Then when it doesn’t work out, it is acceptable because it was “just a rebound”
Netflix and Chill: Going over to somebody's house with the understanding that you are going there solely to have sex with Netflix on in the background.
Hookup: The mutual understanding that you are only having sex and only having sex. A hookup can be a one time event, or somebody you keep around when you only want to have sex without the commitment.
Tinder: A dating app, which is usually used for hookups. You may find somebody who actually wants to go on dates, but that is as rare as going on a date with Ryan Reynolds.
I was out of the dating game for three years, from my senior year of high school until my junior year of college. Within that three year gap, it’s as if dating as I knew it did a complete 180 degree spin. Along with the overly confusing terms that you have to be up to date on, there are also odd mating patterns among millennials that cause even more confusion. There is tinder, there are hookups, you can stalk/ be stalked endlessly online and be judged before somebody has the chance to know you and you are never suppose to show that you’re interested in somebody. That is just the beginning of the weird things that we as millennials are putting up with when we are actively dating.
We should ultimately be asking ourselves, why are we so afraid of showing our feelings to somebody? Where does this fear originate? Why has the world hardened our hearts to love? As a whole, it is saddening because our generation is missing out on honest feelings. We are compromising what we think and feel so we can fall in line with the patterns and trends we have grown so accustomed to.
So, while you are pursing your next boyfriend or girlfriend, you should attempt to think outside of the millennial box. Do things that are not expected of you. Instead of following the messy path that has been paved with dropped expectations and meaningless relationships, create your own path and follow it. You do not have to fall in line with everybody else. Go out on a limb, tell somebody if you are interested in them. Don't play mind games for an extended period of time making them wonder. Have the guts to commit to somebody you want to commit to. There is nothing more beautiful than loving somebody, and being loved in return. Do not let our generation get in the way of that.