Dampened Brutality

Dampened Brutality

A poem of love to our Earth
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Greens, browns, soaked by

the rain.

Silent life is given to

Earth again through

gentle tears from the sky.


Blue, pink, brightened by

the rays.

The singing melody of nature resumes

and welcomes the buds to

join in.


Reds, turquoises, the fairies of our

air are back.

Broken from their cocoons, starting

anew, wearing the

colors of life.


Damp, squishy, the ground soaks

in new life.

Moistened by the tears of

life, showing us that

there is still hope.


Thawing, unfrozen, we are

awoken from our slumber.

Dazed and blinking, we emerge

restored, new, and astounded

by the beauty around us.


Fresh, new, our amazement

continues through the ages.

We respect, are kind, and

loving towards our Earth as we

care for it.


Tortured, ruined, our ancestors

damaged our Earth.

It will never be

the same, always engraved in

her history.


Nurture, caring, we strive to

end the cruelty.

We can never fully recover from the

brutality caused havoc here, but we can

help to repair and to help her

move forward.


Forgiving, kind, our Earth will

never let us down.


Her kindness wants us to be

here, to live, to thrive, to love.

Shouldn't we give that all back to her?

Cover Image Credit: Loren Jones

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A Love Letter To The Girl Who Cares Too Much About Everyone But Herself

You, the girl with a heart full of love and no place big enough to store it all.

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views

Our generation is so caught up in this notion that it's "cool" not to care about anything or anyone. I know you've tried to do just that.

I'm sure there was a brief moment where you genuinely believed you were capable of not caring, especially since you convinced everyone around you that you didn't. But that just isn't true, is it? Don't be ashamed of this, don't let anyone ridicule you for having emotions.

After everything life has put you through, you have still remained soft.

This is what makes you, you. This is what makes you beautiful. You care so deeply and love so boldly and it is incredible, never let the world take this from you.

Have Your Voice Heard: Become an Odyssey Creator

You are the girl who will give and give and give until you have absolutely nothing left. Some may see this as a weakness, an inconvenience, the perfect excuse to walk all over you. I know you try to make sense of it all, why someone you cared so much about would treat you the way they did.

You'll make excuses for them, rationalize it and turn it all around on yourself.

You'll tell yourself that maybe just maybe they will change even though you know deep down they won't. You gave them everything you had and it still feels as if they took it all and ran. When this happens, remind yourself that you are not a reflection of those who cannot love you. The way that people treat you does not define who you are. Tell yourself this every day, over and over until it sticks. Remind yourself that you are gold, darling, and sometimes they will prefer silver and that is OK.

I know you feel guilty when you have to say no to something, I know you feel like you are letting everyone you love down when you do. Listen to me, it is not your responsibility to tend to everyone else's feelings all the time. By all means, treat their feelings with care, but remember it is not the end of the world when you cannot help them right away.

Remember that it is OK to say no.

You don't have to take care of everyone else all the time. Sometimes it's OK to say no to lunch with your friends and just stay home in bed to watch Netflix when you need a minute for yourself. I know sometimes this is much easier said than done because you are worried about letting other people down, but please give it a try.

With all of this, please remember that you matter. Do not be afraid to take a step back and focus on yourself. You owe yourself the same kind of love and patience and kindness and everything that you have given everyone else. It is OK to think about and put yourself first. Do not feel guilty for taking care of yourself. You are so incredibly loved even when it doesn't feel like it, please always remember that. You cannot fill others up when your own cup is empty. Take care of yourself.

Cover Image Credit: Charcoal Alley

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Hello World

I'm Sorry I've Been An Idiot

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This is an open letter to anyone that I have recently offended with my behavior, my actions, my harsh words, my criticism, my insults, my derogatory statements about their religious beliefs, their favorite sports teams or the church they attend. This is an open letter of apology that I owe to the friends in my life, people that have randomly passed by, and those who may barely even know me more than through social media but happen to read some of my stuff and go, "Holy Shit. What's up his ass" - This is for you.

For the last couple of years, I could blame my job on my attitude change. It would be very easy. I've worked in Child Protective Services. I see drug users, abusive parents, dead children, dead parents, dirty houses, and things you would not ever want to see. I would not wish this type of stuff on anyone. I could tell you stories that are so out of this world you'd think I would make them up. And they are so realistic that it's not possible to make those things up. I could easily say that my job screwed me up, it made me the person I've become over the last few months, or that it's destroyed my willpower and turned me into an idiot. It would be so easy to use that as a crutch. But I won't.

I could blame my management, administration and directors for my behavior. I am doing a very difficult job. I am dealing with stress that a normal human being cannot typically deal with. And I have no support from my boss, upper management or my director. It has literally changed me into a negative person. I can go into work, have a positive attitude, be friendly to parents that hit their kids, be respectful to adults who use drugs that nobody should use, and I can be a nice guy to people who deserve to be hit with a baseball bat. I am always nice. I am always respectful. And regardless of the stress level, the fact that myself and every one of my coworkers is grossly over our caseload, and we are on a daily basis mistreated in manners that most people would never tolerate, what we hear from our bosses and managers is, "suck it up. You can handle it." They don't offer support, they don't offer a listening ear. All they do is treat you like crap, drop another case on your desk, go about their merry way, and talk to their friends in their little office clique.

I could blame all of that on my lousy attitude. I could blame a lot of things. I could blame the fact that I deal with depression, that I have no relationship with my family, I grew up with a father who I now realize 30 years later was an abusive asshole who mistreated all of my siblings and myself, and I could point the finger that. I could say that i've been under undue stress after my sister made allegations years ago that my brother sexually abused her (I never believed it - I've always believed it was a lie. Especially after little more than a year later she was living in my parents basement with him, her kids and his kids. Sure. You're going to do that after someone abuses you? I'm thinking not). But I lived with it. And I could use all of that. I could use the fact that my own mother doesn't even talk to me anymore. I could blame it all on the stress of dealing with a lot of personal things that would ruin anyone. But I'm not.

I could point the blame on the fact that my daughter lives 700 miles away, and my grand baby lives up with her, and I'm not able to see her as much as I'd like due to work, life and an assorted group of other things. But I don't. Rather, what I do is act like an idiot, mistreat my friends, don't socialize like I used to, I haven't gone to church in months, I've written some pretty verbally abusive critical articles about Christians, the Christian faith, God, and even people that I've called friends. And it's wrong. And this letter is for you.

I am sorry I've been an idiot. This is to my former coworkers who always wondered what the hell was going on with me. This is to my current coworkers who probably still wonder what the hell is going on. This is to the only friend in my office I trust. I hope she is reading this. She means the world to me, and I would do anything to have her back. This goes out to two of my best friends in the world. Both of these girls mean everything to me. They know only a little bit about what I deal with on a daily basis. They have no clue the stress, the duress and the mess I've lived with. I could use all of that as a crutch and an excuse. But I"m not. I'm just openly admitting that I am sorry to a lot of people. And I owe you all an apology. I've been an idiot. And you didn't deserve it.

Now I'm not going to clam I suddenly found Jesus (I don't think he's lost), or I cured cancer. The government won't let that happen. They'd lose too much money in research funding, medications and pills and prescriptions. They'd go bankrupt and have no money. The crooked politicians would actually have to get off their ass and work. I'm not going to claim I'm going to be this perfect, "I don't make a mistake or screw up" kind of person. That's bullshit. Anyone that says that is lying. And if you believe them? I have a bridge to sell you in Egypt. I really own it.

What I'm doing is taking a minute to say that I'm still going to be human. I'm certain I'll still screw up. I'm certain on occasion I may say some nasty things on Twitter that I would not say on here or on Facebook. I'm just going to do one thing I've always done. Be me. You're not going to get some fake that doesn't practice what he preaches. I don't preach. I read my bible, pray to God, ask Him to forgive me for being a rude, loud mouth (at times) obnoxious asshole. And hopefully He's listening.

I'm going to use this to say I"m sorry to anyone that happens to read this. And with the hopes you won't judge me, criticize me, say "I told you so" when I was telling you that I'd have a bad day, or thinking I"m using something as a crutch. I don't do that. Some people say that others use depression, being bipolar, mental illness and all that as a crutch, an excuse, or as a reason to blame something on whatever happens. I'm not.

I'm just saying that I apologize for being an asshole. I was an idiot. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend, upset, anger or hurt someone's feelings. I do hope you'll forgive me. And my typical personality would say in following that if you don't, well it would involve a two word sentence that starts with F and ends with U. And I'm not going to do that.

I'm going to simply say dear world, I hope you'll forgive me for being an idiot, look past my mistakes, accept me for who I am, and we can go on tomorrow like it's a new day. And hope that I don't do it again.

And that is all. Thanks for reading. If you read this, think it's directed towards you, and it's owed to you? You're probably right. I'm evening saying I'm sorry to God. Because I'm certain He knows I'm the biggest idiot around. The difference is, if I know He doesn't accept me? I'm done. And there's not a lot I can do about it.

If you read this? Thank You. If you accept me tomorrow like you did yesterday, thank you even more. And if you don't? I still want you to know I'm sorry for what I've said, what I've done, how I acted, who I was, and I am going to try as hard as possible to not be that person tomorrow.

God Bless you all. And goodnight.


Me

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