It’s hard to believe I’ve already finished week two of my 30-Day Positivity Challenge. Knowing I get to write about my experience at the end of the week definitely helps me analyze what I’m learning, and blogging about it each night helps me to keep track of all that I’m learning. I pray my experience can speak to you if you, too, are struggling. Know you are not alone.

How did it go?

If week one seemed easy peasy at first, week two felt foggy and groggy.

It felt incredibly hard to get up this week and even harder to get motivated. I felt stuck.

Quite honestly, I could barely get out of my head long enough to even try to re-frame anything in a positive light.

I realized, too, it has been six months since I’ve been to church, and being without a church seems to have a negative impact on me. I’m struggling to connect with God and believe what I believe.

That is something I need to work on.

At the same time, all I wanted was to be left alone.

I came across a quote on Twitter that affected me greatly: “If you want to get over a problem, stop talking about it. Your mind affects your mouth, and your mouth affects your mind.”

It’s something that, as the week progressed and my anger and negativity continued, I tried to hold on to.

It worked (at least a little).

The hardest part is holding myself accountable to it, but I’m working on it.

What did I learn?

If week one taught me what positivity is, or can be, then week two has taught me what I need to create a positive environment for myself as I refocus.

I’ve done my fair part of trying to hold others accountable for my expectations of life. I’ve learned, over not just this week but a few months, I can’t do that.

Life isn’t perfect, and I can’t plan everything. There’s also no way to plan for everything.

Part of holding myself accountable is trusting in my faith and God. I have to hold myself accountable for my thoughts and the words I speak. They should reflect the truth and hope God has given me.

That hope and truth involves trusting in His timing. I have planned for everything for the entirety of my adult life, and it’s really only gotten me into trouble.

Sure, initially, things seem to work out, but, inevitably, something happens that I couldn’t plan for, and suddenly I become angry and scared. We can’t plan for everything in life, and that’s to be expected; God has His own timing for things in our lives.

I realized that, in all my planning, I was trying to rush whatever goodness He had in store for me. In rushing that, though, He needed me to slow down, so now He’s forcing me to.

He’s given me gifts and talents, and He is now providing me with opportunities to explore those. By slowing down and trusting everything to Him, I know mountains can move.

“Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” – Mark 9:24

I’m trying to slow down to hear Him. I’m writing more, spending time with Belle and meditating.

If I slow down my heart rate, my mind will eventually follow.

I encourage you, if you’re struggling with something, no matter what it is, take some time to slow down. Don’t look at your phone all the time; in fact, put it on silent (or “Do Not Disturb” if you have an iPhone), or, better yet, leave it at home.

Take in your surroundings and the fresh air.

Pray or meditate.

Acknowledge when those negative thoughts come in, but watch them float away; you don’t always have to interact with them.

Take time to get to know yourself. That will lead to a positive outlook.