Why Confidence Is Key To Happiness

Why Confidence Is Key To Happiness

We need to be comfortable enough to walk into a room without feeling the need to compare ourselves to the other people there.

As a woman, I have struggled with being confident in who I am in all of the stereotypical and very real ways, such as body image, bad skin break-outs where I have some acne scarring and not feeling like I am pretty enough according to some unforeseen standard.

And of course I believe that men can and do struggle with these same appearance judgements and unrealistic standards. But what I really want to talk about right now is the deepest, most hurtful form of lacking self-confidence that I have constantly struggled with.This is the acceptance of who I am according to my personality, what I am interested in and even the way I am around groups of people.This may not make sense to some people, but I tear myself down by comparing myself to other people's behavior and personality.

To describe myself, I would say that I am not very shy, because I know that I am an extrovert, yet when I am around other people I tend to not be the loudest one in the crowd and often compare myself to those people that are more outgoing than I am and feel that I am not good enough.When I am around people that enjoy doing things that I don't enjoy doing, I tend to criticize myself and believe that I am not a fun person and I need to be more like them or else no one will like me. I can be a perfectionist about certain things, so when there is something I feel I am particularly good at doing and somebody else does that exact same thing, I compare myself to them and make myself think that they are better and that I have failed.

Let me tell you friends...my mind is my own worst enemy and I am my harshest critic. I definitely hold myself up to unrealistic standards that I myself have set because I make myself believe that those things are what people believe about me. And these things are truly hurtful and are complete and total lies that I have to stop believing. I believe that our mind is our most powerful weapon, and it can be used for us or against us. I also believe that by viewing ourselves in any negative way, we diminish one of the most important things we can have: confidence. I don't mean that I think we should all walk around big-headed thinking that we own the world, but I do believe that having confidence in ourselves is essential to living a happy and healthy life.

A quote I saw on Pinterest basically said that being confident does not mean walking into a room with your nose in the air thinking you are better than everyone else, it means you aren't having to compare yourself to anyone in the first place. This may sound super cheesy or maybe a little teenager-ish, but I believe that quote has it all right! We need to be able to walk into a room, any room, and not feel the need to compare ourselves to other people, whether that be body weight, how gorgeous the person beside you is or even our own personalities. When will we learn to be comfortable in our own skin?

Hey, don't worry guys I am still figuring this out to. I struggle daily with thoughts of doubt and even the tiniest of comparisons that can drag my confidence down, but I want to leave you with some hope that you will not always be stuck feeling bad about yourself and that your confidence can be restored. I have no idea who Barrie Davenport is, but I read this quote by him on the internet (yes, I Googled quotes about self-confidence): "Low self-confidence isn't a life sentence. Self-confidence can be learned, practiced, and mastered--just like any other skill. Once you master it, everything in your life will change for the better." And I couldn't agree more!

Learn to be comfortable in your own skin.

Learn to be happy in who you are.

Cover Image Credit: Joshua Miller

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22 Post Malone ‘beerbongs & bentleys’ Lyrics College Kids Will Use As Insta Captions This Summer

It's here, and it's fire.

If you didn't know, I am really not sure how you wouldn't know, but it's fine, Post Malone's new album FINALLY came out! Posty has time and time again proven that he's a trailblazer in the music industry. His genre is a mix of everything, from rap to acoustic guitar, and he sounds like he's at home in both settings.

Here it is, a list of Post Malone lyrics you'll use or see as Instagram captions. I can already feel it, this summer is Posty's summer –– a summer for "beerbongs & bentleys."

1. "Spoil My Night" - "Won't you come spoil my night?"

2. "Spoil My Night" - "Feelings come into play and I'm thinkin' this happens every time"

3. "Spoil My Night" - "Yeah, when I walk up in a party, they all act like they know me"

4. "Zack and Codeine" - "Been livin' fast, no I can't take it slowly"

5. "Zack and Codeine" - "But it don't mean nothing without all my people"

6. "Zack and Codeine" - "Pour that drink 'cause we ain't sleepin' tonight"

7. "Takin Shots" - "Heard that there's a party, I might pay a visit"

8. "Takin Shots" - "Baby, just for the night, you my soulmate"

9. "Over Now" - "I'ma turn the tables, promise you will not forget it"

10. "Stay" - "Damn, who are we right now?"

11. "Blame It On Me" - "These hurricanes inside of my brain"

12. "Same Bitches" - "Bottles on deck, and my drink full"

13. "Same Bitches" - "Population four million, how I see the same bitches?"

14. "Jonestown" - "It happens every time"

15. "92 Explorer" - "She in the front seat head bangin'"

16. "Sugar Wraith" - "And then I went and changed my life"

17. "Sugar Wraith" - "I take the lead, they just follow"

18. "Rockstar" - "Sayin, 'I'm with the band'"

19. "Rockstar" - "Livin’ like a Rockstar, I’m livin’ like a Rockstar"

20. "Rockstar" - "Sweeter than a Pop-Tart”

21. "Psycho" - "Can’t really trust nobody with all this jewelry on you"

22. "Psycho" - "I got homies, let it go"

Cover Image Credit: Post Malone // Instagram

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15 Songs For When You're Having A Depressive Episode

If you're anything like me, music is the language that helps you understand yourself.

Music is the one universal language. I've always found it to be the one constant in my life and as someone who has been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and a bunch of other stuff, these are the songs I've always turned to too help me get through the really hard times in my life.

1. I Wanna Get Better - Bleachers

Jack Antonoff's song "I Wanna Get Better" is my absolute go-to. The song describes exactly what it feels like to frustrated with yourself for feeling so depressed or upset.

2. Clearly - Grace VanderWaal

Her rendition of Johnny Nash's classic "I Can See Clearly Now." A beautiful rendition and since I heard it the first time, I've always felt like I have a weight lifted off of my shoulders. Like I can see everything in a new light. Clearly, you might say. (*wink wink*)

3. Praying - Kesha

Anyone who's ever been a victim of sexual assault, abuse, or anything of the sort can relate to this one. It's such a powerful ballad and it gives me chills every time I listen to it.

4. Nothing to Regret - Robinson

Sometimes, when I'm super low, I like to listen to more upbeat songs to help me get through it and take my mind off of it. "Nothing to Regret" has a perfect balance between soothing and making me want to get up and dance and boost my endorphins to help me feel happier.

5. FEEL. - Kendrick Lamar

"FEEL." just makes me feel things. Sometimes we just don't know how to label what we're feeling, and Kendrick does a great job making us feel understood when we don't even understand ourselves.

6. Carry on - Fun.

I love the message behind this song. It's a classic and always encourages me to get out of my bed and work through my hard times, even when it feels like the entire world is against me.

7. Truthfully - DNCE

If you're like me, sometimes you just like to listen to a ballad or a break-up song to make you feel better. This one has been my top pick for that spot in my "Depressive Episode" Spotify playlist.

8. Kiss Me Slowly - Parachute

This song is a throwback. A bop. It always makes me feel better when it comes on, and I love playing this song when I feel down.

9. 20 Something - SZA

SZA is newer artist, she is so versatile and universally appealing. Not to mention beautiful and talented. As a 20 year old, I feel like I can relate to this song now more than ever, because you can bet your ass I have NOTHING going on in my life that isn't a little bit screwed up.

10. The entire soundtrack to "The Last Five Years"

"Still Hurting" is the first song on the soundtrack, and it also happens to be my favorite. But the entire soundtrack is amazing, and a beautiful story that I love to listen to whenever I'm feeling down because it helps me get lost in a story for a bit.

11. Pretty Hurts - Beyonce

Girls everywhere can belt out this anthem in their bedrooms. When I feel alone, its always nice to play Beyonce. She is an icon and a role model that I feel like every young girl should look up too.

12. guarded - flor

If you're into something a little more lowkey, more alternative, I would suggest almost anything by the band flor. When I am going through a depressive moment, their music is one of my top choices to click on.

13. All Too Well - Taylor Swift

"All Too Well" is one of Taylor Swift's most emotionally complex, and most lyrically beautiful, songs that she has ever written. For me, this song is my "Oh crap! I missed this part now I have to start the whole song over again" song.

14. Matches - The Format

Nate Ruess continues to exceed expectations. Every song he writes, he does so with every ounce of effort and integrity and his music helps people like me and my friends get through our hardest moments.

15. Hunger - Florence + The Machine

Everyone feels like they're never going to succeed in life. Everyone has gone through phases where they just question why everything is going wrong or asked themselves why they're not good enough. Insecurities might stick with us for a while, maybe even forever, but that doesn't mean we can't work through them. We're not alone in our struggles.

So, if you're anything like me, maybe some of these songs will help you too. A mix of slower and upbeat songs, because not everyone is the same. And maybe you don't have the same music taste as me, and that's okay. However, I hope I can help at least one person.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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