30 minutes or 30 hours. No amount of sleep is ever enough for me. Between 20 credit hours of course work, writing, working, being a part of multiple organizations, side projects, resume building, having a social life, and taking care of basic human functions (why do humans have to consume food and water?), I am always busy and always tired.
1. I live on a system of alarms.
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My friends know about the alarms that go off during the day to warn me to get to class. However, they don't know about the threatening series of alarms that are meant to help me to wake up. Lately, I've been crashing as soon as I get home, so I also need a reminder to get up and complete my homework.
Yes. Actual, screenshots of my alarms.
2. My diet largely consists of coffee, Red Bull and caffeinated tea.
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When I first tasted coffee, I thought it tasted like sadness and death. Red Bull was what I imagined carbonated urine would taste like. Sugarless tea used to make me feel sick. Now I drink black coffee, zero calorie/sugar Red Bull and sugarless tea with a caffeine charged smile.
3. I don't have sexual fantasies, I just day dream about sleeping all day.
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When I have time, my mind wanders. I think about sneaking out of class, running into the garage, getting into my car, driving home, opening the door, running to my room, taking off all of my clothes, jumping into bed, and sleeping for a solid four days. My form of sexting is just, "If you were here, God, I'd sleep on you so hard!"
4. I'm really jealous of bears.
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Why can't humans hibernate? I feel like I've earned this. I deserve it. Wtf, evolution? I'll trade you my appendix for the ability to hibernate.
5. Sometimes I stop mid-sentence because I can't remember what I was even thinking about.
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Like this one time… never mind.
6. I'll pretty much sleep anywhere.
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I'm a commuter, but a lot of my commitments require me to be at school for sometimes 12 hours. I've slept in my car and a community sofa. I've even huddled under someone's desk. It was sad. It was pathetic. But it was a satisfying nap.