If College Majors Were Food
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If College Majors Were Food

You are what you eat.

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If College Majors Were Food

College offers many choices in terms of majors. So does your grocery store. Or food court. Or gross dining hall. Or savage Food Network shows. It is easy to see how these choices overlap.

1. English- Oatmeal

It's so versatile! But people still make fun of you. English (oatmeal) is one of the most basic and essential majors (foods) around.

2. Art- A dish that a chef on Cutthroat Kitchen messed up so now he or she is presenting it as "deconstructed" and Alton Brown is shaking his head


People are unnecessarily harsh on art majors (deconstructed dishes). It's a perfectly acceptable field of study (form of presentation). People may question you on why you're pursuing this choice, but you know it's right.

3. Accounting- Soylent


People visibly look disgusted at you when you say your major (what you're ingesting). Guys, accounting (soylent) is so good for you! It's practical, no-frills, and it'll benefit you in the long run.

4. Kinesiology- Salad held by a laughing woman


I don't think I've ever met an ugly kinesiology major. Or one who wasn't fit. Does anything scream "health and fun" like a woman who isn't ugly holding vegetables?

5. Animal Sciences- Cinnabon you pick up when you're waiting for a flight


You major in animal sciences because you love animals so much and want to be a veterinarian so you can help all the dogs of the world. But you forgot the issue that you have to put down Little Jimmy's golden retriever. Like the Cinnabon, it sounds good in theory, but there are overlooked details: killing pets and enough saturated fat to fuel a small village for a month.

6. Government and Politics- Apple pie


Is there anything as American as apple pie and/or aggressive political opinions? Exactly. Find me a government major who isn't heavily involved or interested in politics then we can talk.

7. Speech Language Pathology- Pumpkin Spice Latte


It's a great field (caffeinated beverage) that is somehow associated with being feminine. No one should deny himself from a great career (delicious drink) because of stereotypes. Live your life. Major in that predominantly feminine field (order frilly, overpriced drinks).

8. Mathematics- Taco Bell during daylight hours


"Are you really majoring in that (eating that when it's still daylight outside right now)?" People are judging you harshly. Probably calling you insane. It's no matter though, you're enjoying what you love.

9. Finance- Porterhouse


Is there anything as pretentious as finance (porterhouse steaks)? You enjoy the finer things in life and let other people know. Nothing means more business than ordering an expensive steak when you go out. Unless it's a chain family restaurant, in that case, you look stupid. At least finance majors can probably afford that porterhouse.

10. Engineering- Black coffee


Engineering can be a bitter field filled with grit and darkness. You power through your studies (mug of misery), but let other people know. "UGH, just spend labored through Calculus 77 (my disgusting caffeinated beverage)." We get it: you're a masochist.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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