When I moved to the U.S. in 2014, I knew my experience at college would have a profound influence on my life and mold me into the person I am today. In August of my freshman year, my mom helped me move in and get settled, but soon she left and I was on my own. I had to navigate the world without immediate access to my parents due to the 7-hour time difference and problem-solve on my own. While I’ve found great people along the way who support me, I still miss being able to call up my mom whenever I need her guidance. Navigating the world on our own is something we all experience when we go to college. Whether your parents live in the same state, a different state or a different country, you still experience the same anxieties related to living on our own. I learned to depend on myself and my judgment from day one because I was the one making the decisions. I learned to trust myself and go with my gut feeling about handling difficult situations. I’ve also had to learn to manage and plan my time as my responsibilities add up.
College does more than show you that you can depend on yourself and that you’re capable of living on your own. Moving away and living on your own indicates you are becoming an adult. The biggest adjustment when I went back home for the first time was being accountable to others about where I was, after spending months on my own. You’re truly an adult once you move away to college and you learn a lot about yourself. The people you meet will influence the way you see the world and affect your judgments.
Changing your perspective is normal and expected when you’re put into uncomfortable situations.
These are the situations that will result in your greatest personal growth. Friendships will also change. I think this was my biggest learning curve coming to college. In high school, my graduating class was 60 students so it was a shock to have thousands of students around me. This meant it was harder for me to reach out and maintain friendships with people. Once I learned this, I realized I had to put in significant effort because personal lives become even more complicated in college. Losing friends is another obstacle. Things change every day and certain situations can end your friendships with people, but always remember that everything happens for a reason.
Even though it’s been a bumpy road at times, I would not change a single thing about this experience. I’ve learned to rely on myself, but more importantly, learned I’m capable of living on my own. I’ve also learned the value of letting go and moving on from minor situations that don’t have a significant impact on my life and future. Letting go has allowed me to live without grudges and I feel like I have less weight on my shoulders than before. I am now able to focus on important aspects of my life, like my school, building my professional network, and friends and family.
College is a life-changing and life-forming adventure we each experience in different ways. College changes us, but we have to be comfortable with being molded into the people we are becoming.