How To Find Your Closest Friends In College

How To Find Your Closest Friends In College

How I found my "people" in college
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When you first get to college it can be really difficult to find your group of friends that you know no matter what will always be there for you. For me, I found mine within my sorority once I got my Big and had not only her but her Big and her twin and her twin's Little. With them I know I'm set for many reasons.

When looking for your "people" in college you should always find people you can picture at your wedding in the future. If you can see that person table dancing or catching the bouquet at your wedding then you know you've got the best type of friends. Those that make you laugh and smile when you are at your lowest points in life are the people you should be surrounding yourself with because in the future they will still be there for you.

You should also find the people you can joke around with. My Big always asks for a cookie and I say "no" even though I'm really joking and I'm going to give her the cookie anyway. Jokes like that or making fun of each other without going too far are the humor you need in your life. Now if someone is just straight going for things they know you are insecure about then they are not your real friends. Jokes should be lighthearted and humorous, not mean and rude.

The last thing you need when finding your best friends in college is a close bond. If you don't feel comfortable around those people and don't feel like you can tell them almost anything then you don't have a close bond. I can tell my sorority fam almost anything in the world and they won't judge me. I also know I can call any of them up and they will listen. We are just very close and I know they will always be my friends.

Finding friends in college is difficult, but once you have that group you will know they are your friends for life. You can't go actively searching because close friends just kind of happen. I got lucky with finding mine and you will get lucky too.

Cover Image Credit: Ashley Duke

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To The Grandmothers Who Made Us The Women We Are Today

Sincerely, the loving granddaughters.
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The relationship between a grandmother and her granddaughter is something so uniquely special and something to be treasured forever.

Your grandma loves you like you are her own daughter and adores you no matter what. She is the first person you run to when you have a problem with your parents and she never fails to grace you with the most comforting advice.

She may be guilty of spoiling you rotten but still makes sure to stress the importance of being thankful and kind.

Your grandma has most likely lived through every obstacle that you are experiencing now as a young adult and always knows just exactly what to say.

She grew up in another generation where things were probably much harder for young women than they are today.

She is a walking example of perseverance, strength, and grace who you aim to be like someday.

Your grandma teaches you the lessons she had to learn the hard way because she does not want you to make the same mistakes she did when she was growing up.

Her hugs never fail to warm your heart, her smile never fails to make you smile, and her laugh never fails to brighten your day.

She inspires you to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

You only hope that one day you can be the mother and grandmother she was to you.

A piece of girl’s heart will forever belong to her grandma that no one could ever replace.

She is the matriarch of your family and is the glue that holds you all together.

Grandmothers play such an important role in helping their granddaughters to grow into strong, intelligent, kind women.

She teaches you how to love and how to forgive.

Without the unconditional love of your grandma, you would not be the woman you are today.

To all of the grandmothers out there, thank you for being you.

Sincerely,

the loving granddaughters

Cover Image Credit: Carlie Konuch

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3 Reasons To Cut That Bad Friend Off

We all have that one friend who is generally bad for us.

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We all have that one friend who is generally bad for us. It is perfectly okay to think about yourself and do what is right for you. It can be very toxic and unhealthy to constantly be around a bad influence in any kind of way. People always say they want to be financially secure or feeling secure with their significant other, but friendships also need security. Here are three reasons why that may not be the case.

1. They aren't supportive.

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We all have that friend who generally does not care about what you say or do. You gotta be careful with that. Some people will act like they do, but behind closed doors with their other friends they don't. There are so many things to talk about with friends especially problems and issues within each other's personal life. If that person isn't making any attempt to show any kind of sympathy for you, they aren't the friend for you.

True friends are always behind your back in whatever you may be going through. Yes sometimes it can be hard because everyone has their own problems, but if you are willing to give and take it makes a good balance. What I mean by that is, giving each other space to breathe and reflect on things that are happening, then come together and talk about it with one another.

2. Too clingy or needy.

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Another part in having not so good friends is if the person is too close to where they don't give you any space to get yourself together. The person who is clingy may have personal things going on in their life to make them like that and that is okay. But it can become unhealthy if the problems start becoming your problems and it is taking over your life in a negative way. What I mean by that is if that person is acting a certain way towards you and you can't seem to enjoy life as much sometimes to where you actually feel miserable, that is unhealthy. For example, jealousy. There are some friends who are very clingy because they are nosy and very jealous.

They don't take your kind friendship seriously because they are too busy secretly comparing their life to yours. There are some things in life that you can't control or help others with because it has to be handled a certain way. At the same time, you are still going through your own things and it can be draining to try and "fix" someone else when you have a lot on your plate as it is. Sometimes it is best to cut them off if they generally will not leave you alone or they are manipulating you in any kind of way from it. Sometimes doing that gives people a wake-up call of how they take their anger or problems out on others.

3. They talk about you behind your back.

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To make this clear, everyone talks about everyone. There is nothing wrong with that. But there is a difference between generally talking about someone to inform someone about what is going on, expressing frustration and trying to resolve something by asking for advice, compared to actually bad mouthing about someone in a very rude and mean way. If the person is actually saying mean things about you, they aren't the friend for you. If they insult you in any kind of way (race, gender, outer appearance, personality, family or other friends), it is best to stop being friends with them. If they talk about you behind your back and plan anything to try and harm you or someone else, it is best to cut them off and also inform some type of authority.

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