You've heard the saying, "She doesn't have a filter." Not to be egotistical, but they were talking about me. This is true on its face. I am intentional with my words, sometimes my mouth simply works faster than my brain. This foot-in-mouth-syndrome has taught me how to thoroughly explain my thoughts when I originally say something with less sugar coating this necessary. It has taught me the importance of reading your audience before opening your mouth. It has taught me that some people really do not want honesty. It has gotten me in some sticky situations, but I would prefer this rather than the sugar coating, the beading behind the bush, the walking on eggshells.

I never had a fear of marine life, but I did have a fear of the unknown (I'm completely unique in this I know). It wasn't until some innocent bystander pointed out that you don't know what's in the ocean water that I began to appreciate seeing my feet in the water. I like to know what I'm working with. This preference applies to words just as much as it applies to beaches.

I have heard that some people prefer to not know hard truths. These interesting folks live in their happy bubbles, shouting the perks of ignorance to the other bubble folk. I do not understand these people, and I have no doubt the feeling is mutual. I have not had a truth I cannot handle, does that make me strong, or have I just had a good life? Probably both. With that said, so far I need the truth. The raw truth.

SO! What is the point of all of this? I like clear water. I like clear words. I like clear wants. That third one, this is where being blunt gets me where I want faster. This is where that "blunt" character feature is beneficial. A wise human once told me, "If you don't ask for what you want, how will you get it?" Whoa did that one stick.

Ask for what you want. Whether its a raise, how your crush feels about you, or a promotion, ask. Maybe you are one of those people that walks into a room and gets handed your wants and desires on a silver platter. If so, don't you get bored? Probably not. For the rest of us, asking never killed anyone. You know what else never killed anyone? Rejection. So if he doesn't text back fast enough, she sends mixed messages, or he seems to have loaded lines, ASK. Your boss seems to thoroughly appreciate the role you hold in the business and need you to operate, but hasn't given you a raise in you don't know how long? ASK.

The key in my experience is genuinely knowing your worth. When you know your value, being clear in what you want feels, like, natural. Why would you accept less than what you deserve? I truly believe that the most successful people made sure they were getting what they deserved. They did not wait for their owl to bring their letter. They called up the person holding what they wanted, they told the hat their house, they picked their own broom.

Next time you're staring at your toes in the clear water, think about what you want. Think about what you can do to get there. Think about the worst thing that can happen if you don't ask for what you want. Think about how much the rejection would suck. Then think about how much not knowing sucks more. I have had rejection after rejection. I wallow for a second, and I bounce back better than I had the time before. I cannot stand wondering what baby shark is hitting my leg in the ocean, what that boy's Snapchat really meant, or what would happen if I applied to the law firm I so badly where I so badly want to work. I ask. Sometimes I get what I want, other times I don't. But I am clear, and so are my relationships.

I know where I stand in my wants, do you?