A look around Hollywood would make anyone think that divorce rates are skyrocketing and that two successful people can't make a relationship work. Channing Tatum & Jenna Dewan, Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux, and Chris Pratt & Anna Faris are just a few divorces that come to mind among hundreds.

If you experienced separation in your life and only hear about an influx in Hollywood break-ups, your outlook on relationships in general could be skewed. Celebrities live in a filtered world and for the most part, nothing is what it seems. Just like most of the people on social media, they are not posting about hardships, they only focus on the positive and it can be very difficult to have a positive outlook on your relationship and lives if you compare yourself to what you see on social media.

We can no longer say BRB to the internet, and whether we want to accept it, we live here now. Our view on many aspects of life is slowly deteriorating because of the messages we see from everyone, including Hollywood, which unfortunately can be very influential.

Celebrities only show us what they want.

Any time you see a report on a couple it's only if they are #relationshipgoals, #couplegoals or if their relationship is up in flames. But we are only seeing reports on a very small amount of people. It turns out, divorce rates are actually experiencing a steady decline. Divorce rates in the United States actually peaked in 1980 when the national average was around 22.8%. From 2000 to the late 2000’s a slight increase in divorce was recorded, until it steadily decreased to 16.7% in 2016.

We have no idea what happens behind closed doors, and sadly for a "famous couple" they are under a magnifying glass, with millions judging and commenting on signs that the relationship is doomed or that they are what we should all aspire to be. Those couples who may be stable go unnoticed because who wants to read about normal relationships?

People who live in the spotlight also have the power to manipulate situations or stage "photo ops" to convey a specific message. If they don't want to be seen, believe me, they will remain a mystery. On social media in particular, they can manipulate their image even more. It's important to remind ourselves that we should never aspire to be in a relationship that we only see play out on social media or on the news. It's not just me saying it, divorce experts agree.

What do experts & statistics actually say about failed relationships?

Florida divorce attorney, Steven D. Miller, has been working with families for over 30 years to complete the steps necessary to legally separate from a failing marriage. He has noticed a few commonalities between the couples he has worked with over the years.

“A good marriage is like a good book. It will have a beginning, a middle and an end. Most couples I see, throw the book away before getting to the middle, and they rarely reach the end. Though it is so cliché’, communication is the key. Communication takes many forms.”

He insists that all couples he works with think about the resolution of their issues before they proceed, “people are quick to divorce without really trying to save their relationship.” Divorce experts agree that it can often be an easy way out of a situation that might require more effort to save.

So, are our perspectives on long-term relationships changing?

One thing we can say for sure is that people are waiting longer to get married these days. In the 1970’s it was found that 95% of women were married by the time they were 31 years old. In 2017 the average age a woman was getting married was 27.

More women in college, starting careers, and with the fear of following in their parent’s footprints have motivated many people to push marriage. Experts agree that couples that get married earlier in life are more likely to get divorced, so the trend to wait longer to tie the knot could be helping the declining divorce rate.

Another factor could be that more couples are choosing to live together before they get married. It is not clear how closely this relates to divorce rates, however, it was originally assumed that living together before marriage led to a higher divorce rate. When they compared the age that couples first moved in together, either pre or post marriage, the increase in divorce nearly disappeared.

It is an important message for anyone that might be feeling jaded about marriage. Many people still believe that marriage can be an important step in life. They are treating it with more caution to make sure that it lasts, and not rushing into a decision out of the belief that they “have to.” Despite what you might see on TV or social media, all hope for a successful marriage or a long lasting relationship should not be lost.