If Something Ends, It’s Only The Start Of A New Chapter

If Something Ends, It’s Only The Start Of A New Chapter

Your life is like a book and we have many, many chapters within it.
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I realized something this morning.

After I woke up twenty minutes before my alarm went off, downed a cup of instant coffee, and went running around the lake right outside my neighborhood, I got home and turned the shower faucet to cold. The week was long and stressful and many things took place. They soon will bring unavoidable consequences. Along with brooding over my current situation, a flood of memories from the past arose and overwhelmed me.

There’s no reason why I should have been reliving the past and dwelling on my mistakes. I’m in the shower. Absentmindedly washing my hair, reaching for the conditioner, and I realize, if I could go back and change what happened, I wouldn’t be here right now.

I know we’ve all heard the phrase in some form or another, “If I change the past, everything changes.” It’s the butterfly effect and Ashton Kutcher taught us that going back in an attempt to change the past only ruins the present even more. It’s tempting to imagine how it would be if we got the chance to go back. There are moments that if I changed my behavior, so many circumstances would be different now. If I never left California, would I even be here writing this now?

I should have told my family how I felt. I shouldn’t have said the things I said. Why didn’t I try to keep them together? Why did I give up so easily and leave?

It’s scary to think that we have so much power at any given moment to change our lives completely. One action has the ability to bring on so many life changes. Going back may seem like it’s the perfect way to fix the past and prevent all the pain you felt, but it’s not.

There’s a reason we can’t go back. John Green wrote, “That’s the good thing about pain. It demands to be felt.” Pain is necessary, it prevents us from making the same mistake again, it teaches us, it molds us, we are better from it. Burning yourself with the curling iron is a pain in the neck, literally, but you know to be more careful in the future.

I firmly believe everything happens for a reason. There was a time when all my family felt were tension and distrust, and sometimes I imagine myself returning to that period and acting differently. But, even if I went back trying to fix it, I couldn’t save them on my own.

If I went back and changed what happened, I wouldn’t be here today. Perhaps I would still be somewhere closer to the place I used to call home. Maybe I’d see my family more often. But I wouldn’t have met the people I met these past two years. I wouldn’t of been forced to trust the people I do now and develop long, lasting relationships. And despite how long it took to like where I am and what I’m doing in my life now, I’m happy with the way things are.

The temptation to imagine your life without the pain of the past should be avoided. It only makes you feel like you’re to blame. This pipedream of returning to the past is only a mechanism to deal with bad decisions in the past. In between wiping our eyes during the Fault in Our Stars, we all heard Shailene Woodley say “pain demands to be felt.” Whatever happens will happen. Mistakes happen. Your life is like a book and we have many, many chapters within it.

If something ends, it’s only the start of a new chapter for you.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/wolfkann/15308600299/in/photolist-pjLzwt-9EQYC5-52QLU-sqGzxb-9RxAtN-dV4e28-9nbnDa-fVxsD-nEeSVu-abCUUy-aaUFev-bTKxB4-7jZVwN-arFTqU-9Qd5gw-aZ65jT-6Xwga5-ZG57Hr-dXJjZW-dFtf6N-4tmJEH-o7Z7C4-8zGJJ6-9jLRzy-9jLRsy-6LGbGg-87LKWW-7fz2pM-9rLSHs-sutaX-6bwbhP-9yz8sA-oypofx-4qpFmn-6qhxqh-dP29K2-7CQ7GC-5aYjNH-ekrtSk-9jHM1k-9jLRdW-3EAhUE-9jHMiv-TvqssT-iXeY6v-e8TwRS-ooWbfe-6j58tH-9jLRmd-d1ok5u

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30 Things I'd Rather Be Than 'Pretty'

Because "pretty" is so overrated.
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Nowadays, we put so much emphasis on our looks. We focus so much on the outside that we forget to really focus on what matters. I was inspired by a list that I found online of "Things I Would Rather Be Called Instead Of Pretty," so I made my own version. Here is a list of things that I would rather be than "pretty."

1. Captivating

I want one glance at me to completely steal your breath away.

2. Magnetic

I want people to feel drawn to me. I want something to be different about me that people recognize at first glance.

3. Raw

I want to be real. Vulnerable. Completely, genuinely myself.

4. Intoxicating

..and I want you addicted.

5. Humble

I want to recognize my abilities, but not be boastful or proud.

6. Exemplary

I want to stand out.

7. Loyal

I want to pride myself on sticking out the storm.

8. Fascinating

I want you to be hanging on every word I say.

9. Empathetic

I want to be able to feel your pain, so that I can help you heal.

10. Vivacious

I want to be the life of the party.

11. Reckless

I want to be crazy. Thrilling. Unpredictable. I want to keep you guessing, keep your heart pounding, and your blood rushing.

12. Philanthropic

I want to give.

13. Philosophical

I want to ask the tough questions that get you thinking about the purpose of our beating hearts.

14. Loving

When my name is spoken, I want my tenderness to come to mind.

15. Quaintrelle

I want my passion to ooze out of me.

16. Belesprit

I want to be quick. Witty. Always on my toes.

17. Conscientious

I want to always be thinking of others.

18. Passionate

...and I want people to know what my passions are.

19. Alluring

I want to be a woman who draws people in.

20. Kind

Simply put, I want to be pleasant and kind.

21. Selcouth

Even if you've known me your whole life, I want strange, yet marvelous. Rare and wondrous.

22. Pierian

From the way I move to the way I speak, I want to be poetic.

23. Esoteric

Do not mistake this. I do not want to be misunderstood. But rather I'd like to keep my circle small and close. I don't want to be an average, everyday person.

24. Authentic

I don't want anyone to ever question whether I am being genuine or telling the truth.

25. Novaturient

..about my own life. I never want to settle for good enough. Instead I always want to seek to make a positive change.

26. Observant

I want to take all of life in.

27. Peart

I want to be honestly in good spirits at all times.

28. Romantic

Sure, I want to be a little old school in this sense.

29. Elysian

I want to give you the same feeling that you get in paradise.

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Cover Image Credit: Favim

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My Love-Hate Relationship with Starbucks

This is my oh so wonderful experience at Starbucks during the week of midterms.

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When I usually go to Starbucks, I typically get the same type of drinks: carmel macchiato, chai tea latte, chestnut praline chai tea latte (which sadly is only a holiday drink), or a shaken black tea lemonade with light ice. However, sometimes a person just gets bored drinking the same three drinks over and over, so I thought, "Hey! lets get out of our comfort zone here pal and try something new." So I did I walked my tired stressed out self to Starbucks 10 minutes before my next class and ordered a tall cinnamon shortbread latte, I mean the description and other peoples comments about it made it sound super good.


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As I was waiting for my drink I noticed that one of the baristas was having some issues with some type of syrup, but I thought that they would refill it and then add what they need, and that one probably wasn't even mine. When they did that, I saw them get a new jug of syrup and I went back onto my phone and to try and plan how I was going to get through this midterms week.

Quick info about midterms: everyone is dead, and everyone is stressed. Us college students literally live off of caffeine during midterms week. If you're lucky like me you are at school from 8 a.m. until 6 p.m., so the caffeine is really needed.


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Now soon after I saw the new jug come, my name was called. I grabbed my drink and walked like the walking zombie I was to my next class. I went in for my first drink I was so excited to have this sweet taste of vanilla, cinnamon and coffee...but what I got was the opposite. It literally tasted like a very burnt somewhat coffee and cinnamon edible without the marijuana affects, or for the non-edible people, a very bad tasting cookie that was missing all the sugar. I was not a happy camper one bit, but I was going to drink it anyway because I payed $4 for this coffee. I struggled drinking this during my writing class because it tasted terrible, but then out of no where I got this hit of sweet — I was drinking the sweet vanilla and the sweet cinnamon part of my drink minus the majority of the coffee since I was 3/4 done with the drink. I was seriously crying on the inside because I didn't get to enjoy this drink the way I needed.


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Then the realization hit me: 1. They probably didn't add in the missing parts of the syrup once it got refilled since they suddenly got busy. 2. They did not stir that drink one bit because all the syrup was literally at the bottom of the cup. If they did these, then the problem wouldn't have happened.

This is not the first time this has happened to me having all the syrup at the bottom of the cup at a Starbucks. Its not like I am able to swish it around myself because it is full to the top and I don't want hot coffee poured or splashed on my hand. Also, most people are on-the-go while they are drinking their coffee or doing other things. I have only had this issue at Starbucks and never at any other place have I had this issue like Anthem Coffee.


So can Starbucks just agree to always mix their drinks? So that the zombie college kids during midterms have good coffee to keep them alive?


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