You met that person at a party through a mutual friend, or god forbid, Tinder, and have spent the last six months in an awkward abyss of no real definition to what you are. You more than just sleep together; sometimes you hang out. In broad daylight. In public. On a Tuesday. Friends have seen you with this person enough times to question what you guys really are. Something is actually happening between you two because there are witnesses, right? Does that make you friends...with benefits? Not enough friendship or benefits are happening, so you don’t even know if that is the right term to call it.
Dating in this generation makes me wonder how any of us is ever going to settle down. Today’s hookup culture is a mixture of pretending not to be interested, holding back any real feelings, and disappearing before any real relationship happens. There is no moving forward, just pressing rewind and starting over. But how many redos do we need, or get? Since we never seem to follow through with a relationship in the first place, this question is especially legitimate.
We waste precious time in the endless unknown territory. We make up excuses to hide our feelings. We'd rather live in denial than confront the other person. What if we changed that way of thinking? What if we were just up front with what we want and let things go from there?
There is a beauty in owning up to where you stand and want to stand with a person in a relationship. You feel freer, more confident, and more open to possibilities. The air is clear enough for you to choose if you want to take a chance on someone or just do yourself a favor and let them pass by. You give yourself an opportunity to eliminate the unnecessary stress of wondering if he or she is interested in possibly pursuing a relationship with you.
The idea of defining the relationship is empowering. If a significant amount of time has passed leaving you curious to what direction things are going, it's gratifying. You are no longer going "crazy," always constantly worry about your actions or your significant other's actions. You get to make peace with the situation and go forward in your relationship journey. Most of all, you allow yourself to move on with no regrets.