Nowadays, having a non-traditional or blended family is way more common than it used to be. Having any mix of step-parents, step-siblings, or half-siblings is not unusual for many families. In fact, about 50% of families in the U.S. are remarried, re-coupled, or blended.

Even so, I still get funny looks from time to time when I tell people that I have three siblings, and then farther into the conversation have to explain that only one of them is biological. Despite the fact that blended families or divorced parents are not a new thing, some people are still shocked when they find out that I split the holidays or have two addresses.

The reaction people have is usually pity. Even if they’re a product of a blended family themselves, they still usually tell me how sorry they are that my parents are no longer together. When I was much younger, and my parents were newly separated, I accepted the looks of pity and the “I’m sorry’s” from others. The divorce was tough for me, as it would be for any kid, and I mourned the loss of the family unit that we had all used to be.

But as I got older and I found myself with a new step-parent and two new siblings, the more I understood that my parent’s divorce was necessary for the happiness of our entire family. My parents were two people who simply weren’t meant to be together forever. It happens. And the best part is that I got to expand my family and fill my life with more people that loved me.

Was my parents splitting up rough for me as a kid? Yes. But do I wish it had never happened? Not for a second.

Having a blended family has shaped me into the person I am today. It’s taught me that it isn’t genetics or biology that equal a family; it’s love.

When two people divorce, one might assume that you lose a lot of things, but I found that the opposite occurred in my situation. Throughout the process of my parent's divorce, I gained so much. Strength, a new outlook on life and love, and an entire extended family. But most importantly I gained the ability to try and find the good when bad things happen.

It’s oftentimes hard for people to understand that I view my entire family as just that: family. Not step-family, not strangers that I’m related to by marriage. If you ask me I’ll tell you that I have three siblings. Not one brother and two step-siblings. Just because we don’t share the same DNA doesn’t mean we aren’t family, that’s just how it is.

And now when people tell me that they’re sorry about my family situation, I tell them “Thanks, but don’t be. It was for the best," because it truly was. My parents may not be together, but that doesn’t lessen their love for me in any way. Having a blended family has been one of the biggest blessings in my life, and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.