Everyone has things their insecure about. A few of mine are my thighs (I’m Charlotte from Sex and the City), my sense of humor, and my intelligence. Overall of those insecurities, there’s one that is above the rest, and it is my ability of being a good person.
My mom is the most amazing person you will ever meet. She is like Mother Teresa to me. She is the person that does the right thing no matter what, even if she knows she is going to get screwed over. For years, my mom has demonstrated what it means to be a good person, and honestly watching her, I have absolutely no idea if I have what it takes.
A lot of people are scared of becoming their mom, but I’m scared that I won’t be like her. Everyday I think to myself, WWLD (what would Lee do?) when I’m faced with a tough situation, and most of the time it turns out okay. Other times, I just choose not to think WWLD, and that is what gets me in trouble.
Overall, I think that I am a pretty good person, but I don’t know if I am the best. It drives me crazy sometimes when I think at night of how I could be a better person that day. It’s almost as if I’m looking in the mirror and thinking how I could get my thighs smaller. Like I said, it’s not that I’m not a good person I do as much as I can for other people, whether they deserve it or not. I just know I can be better, and I’m insecure because I don’t know if I will ever get better.
A lot of people say insecurities are all in a person’s head and if they want to fix something about themselves they should do it. I get that. However, some things are easier said than done. For me, I am too emotional. Some may think, that I’m a raging female dog and am the worst person ever, but it has everything to do with the fact that I’m super sensitive. My sensitivity makes me act more on my emotions, rather than what’s the right thing to do.
Being a good person is being able to accept those emotions AND still being able to do what is right. I worry a lot, that I will not master that concept.