To the man who will someday marry my best friend,
Keep in mind, we are a packaged deal. So take everything I say into account because if anyone knows her best, it is me. That being said, I am not going anywhere, so I suggest you learn to love me too. It shouldn't be too hard considering we are basically the same person. But if you hate me, your relationship will become unnecessarily difficult as I will always be around, with way more inside jokes than you have with her. However, if you learn to embrace me as I will with you, I will be your greatest ally. We have a common goal, and that is to see my best friend happy, and I will do everything in my power to help you do that.
Keep in mind is how much she loves naps. NEVER COME BETWEEN HER AND HER SLEEP. If you have made it this far, chances are you already know this, but she is basically a sloth. There is no pattern, rhyme, or reason to her sleep schedule. I have personally witnessed her sleep for over 12 hours, wake up, make a snack, and then return to bed. The best thing for you to do is to go about your life and let her sleep or to just join in on the napping bliss because we both know she is a great cuddler.
Speaking of snacks, don't ever question her ability to eat or what she is eating. Know that it is never a bad time to eat Bagel Bites, and that bringing her Mild Boneless Wings will result in lots of kisses and a happy girlfriend. Don't ever suggest a salad, because she says that salads are "bird food". Also, don't question when she wants to go to McDonald's at 2 a.m. or eat leftover pizza at 6 a.m. Just go with it pal.
Take her to all of the places she has ever wanted to go. Take her to New York City, and on a road trip across the country. Be fair warned, she will sleep the whole drive, but she is the best person to go touring with. Provide her with awesome music on the trip and take thousands of pictures. She is the kind of person who you won't want to forget anything about, even the faces she makes when eating new foods (she doesn't like to be adventurous).
Know that when she is sick, she wants to eat Ramen Noodles, drink Ginger Ale, and re-watch Sleeping Beauty and every Romantic Comedy she has already made you watch a million times. I get it, you don't really want to watch "Going the Distance" for the third time this week, but she does. Do it anyway, because I promise you she won't easily forget all of the times you have taken care of her.
Accept her family. It will be really hard with every one of her cousins (she has like 3,000), uncles, and siblings. They are tough to tolerate sometimes, and they are loud and moody, but when they accept you it is the best thing ever. They will put you through the ringer, and not let up until you have proven yourself, but they are all good people at heart. You will make her so incredibly happy when you love them like your own. Not to mention, you have like 10,000 more connections spanning the nation, and maybe even Russia, to back you up if you ever need it.
Finally, never stop telling her she is beautiful and smart and funny. She will never ask you to say it, but she wants you to. Don't get mad that I know all about the inner workings of your relationship because we tell each other everything. She may never watch football with you, but my best friend is the most loyal and caring person I have ever known. And if you start forgetting to kiss her goodbye and dance with her every once in a while in your living room, you will lose her. It is truly the littlest things. Nevertheless, I can't wait to meet you because if you are destined to marry her, you must be pretty fantastic. Lots of love!
Sincerely,
Your true love's first soulmate