My best friend and I have been friends for almost two years now, and in that time I have learned many things about her. I can proudly say that I know her better than anyone else. I can basically read her mind; I know exactly what she thinks.
I know what she wants and what she needs out of a future husband. So, to the man who gets the pleasure of calling her his wife, here are some tips and pointers for you to know now, so you'll know what to do later.
1. She Eats Vinegar With Everything... And I Mean Everything
I've seen this girl eat vinegar with pizza, wings, chips, fries, burgers and even bacon. It's disgusting, but she loves it. Accept her vinegar obsession.
2. She Documents Almost Everything
This girl will record you doing stupid stuff at random moments. And if something funny happens when she wasn't recording, she'll make you reenact it to get it on video (note: it's not as funny then). Just be prepared to be recorded at all hours.
3. ... Then She'll Play It On A Loop
You will most likely wake up to her playing the video over and over (and over) at the highest volume possible. At the most outrageous hours. And then her laughing about it for twenty minutes.
4. She Doesn't Know How To Turn Her Volume Down
You'll be watching TV and she'll play a video on her phone and keep it loud. She doesn't care if you're doing something.
5. She Doesn't Like TV
She loves One Tree Hill, but she hates to sit and watch TV for hours. She gets restless and she'll complain about it.
6. She Doesn't Know Sports, So Don't Expect Too Much
Long story short, she once thought a "turkey bowl" was when you bowled using a turkey to knock down the pins.
7. She's Clingy
She always wants to cuddle. Always. It's not always a bad thing, but just know that she is very clingy.
8. She's Extremely Thoughtful
She would go to the ends of the earth to make you happy. She would drive four hours just to see you for twenty minutes. She'd give her life savings to buy you a milkshake if that's what you wanted. She puts effort into her gifts. She always makes sure you're happy.
9. She's Lazy
I'm sure if you asked her to marry you that you already know this, but she's lazy. She hates the idea of exercise and moving more than five feet makes her cringe.
10. She'll Hype You Up
She may be lazy and hate sports, but she'll hype you up on the sidelines--as long as she doesn't have to sit for too long. When in doubt, she always posts about her proudness on social media.
11. She Loves Steak 'N Shake
It's her favorite; make sure you know that. She loves Fresco Melts. But she's not really a fan of the shakes. She'll eat her fries and yours, too (with vinegar, of course).
12. She Needs Coffee To Function
She loves pour-over, but Starbucks is a good second. Iced Americanos are her life. She is a crabby, non-functioning mess until she gets caffeine.
13. She's Obsessed With Poetry
Need brownie points with her or just simply want to make her happy? Buy her poetry books. You're welcome.
14. She'll Get Overly Emotional
She'll get very sad when you're leaving, she'll get extremely happy when something good happens. Just watch out for when she gets mad, because it's extreme.
15. She's Been Hurt
She's been hurt before. She's been let down many times. She's had her trust broken. Don't be one of those people. Prove to her (and to me) that you're a good one. That you're the real deal.
16. Hold Her
Hold her when she's sad. Let her cry into your shirt. Rub her back. Just hold her every chance you get. Make her feel wanted, finally.
17. She Hates Pet Names
She thinks they're gross. Even "babe" and "baby". She will, however, compare you to an animal and then ingrain that into your mind so that every time you or her sees something somewhat related to that animal, she all but throws a party over it. (I have been labeled "Chicken"...I hope you get better than that.)
18. She Has A Hard Past
Take time to get to know her and all that she's been through. Accept her. Realize that you're not perfect and neither is she. Please fall in love with the ugly parts of her that make her her.
19. She Gets In Her Head Too Much
You'll think things are fine and then she switches over and she's in her head. Reassure her constantly. Pray with her. Be patient.
20. She Cares Too Much What People Think
It's a downfall. Help her grow through it, please. Maybe with you and I telling her positive things all the time, she'll finally realize that those negative things people say don't matter.
21. She Makes Playlists For Every Occasion
Going to be in a car for forty minutes? Playlist. Just got engaged? Playlist. Adopted a puppy? Playlist.
22. She Will Compare You To Anything And Everything
"You look like the candlestick from Beauty and the Beast" "That fish looks like you" "You're a stool" "This tree looks like you" "This monkey looks just like you" These are just a few things I've heard her compare me and others to. Don't worry, though, she means it in the best way possible.
23. When She Starts To Panic, You Need To Talk Softly.
Panic attacks happen. More often than we'd like to admit. Talk softly and hold her. Remind her to breathe.
24. She Cannot Cook
Not to save her life. I hope you know how to cook if you ever want to eat.
25. Finally, We're A Package Deal
You marry her, you basically marry me. I helped write all your texts when you guys were dating. I helped pick out your anniversary presents. I come with her, so I pray you and I get along. If you hurt her, I hurt you. Got that?
You have been blessed with the best woman that I know. She has her flaws, but she will love you better than anyone I know (besides Jesus). She will pray for you, and with you. Cherish her and lead her. I'm so excited to see how happy you make her. She deserves nothing but happiness.