25 Things My Best Friend's Future Husband Needs To Know

25 Things My Best Friend's Future Husband Needs To Know

You have been blessed with the best woman that I know.
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My best friend and I have been friends for almost two years now, and in that time I have learned many things about her. I can proudly say that I know her better than anyone else. I can basically read her mind; I know exactly what she thinks.

I know what she wants and what she needs out of a future husband. So, to the man who gets the pleasure of calling her his wife, here are some tips and pointers for you to know now, so you'll know what to do later.

1. She Eats Vinegar With Everything... And I Mean Everything

I've seen this girl eat vinegar with pizza, wings, chips, fries, burgers and even bacon. It's disgusting, but she loves it. Accept her vinegar obsession.

2. She Documents Almost Everything

This girl will record you doing stupid stuff at random moments. And if something funny happens when she wasn't recording, she'll make you reenact it to get it on video (note: it's not as funny then). Just be prepared to be recorded at all hours.

3. ... Then She'll Play It On A Loop

You will most likely wake up to her playing the video over and over (and over) at the highest volume possible. At the most outrageous hours. And then her laughing about it for twenty minutes.

4. She Doesn't Know How To Turn Her Volume Down

You'll be watching TV and she'll play a video on her phone and keep it loud. She doesn't care if you're doing something.

5. She Doesn't Like TV

She loves One Tree Hill, but she hates to sit and watch TV for hours. She gets restless and she'll complain about it.

6. She Doesn't Know Sports, So Don't Expect Too Much

Long story short, she once thought a "turkey bowl" was when you bowled using a turkey to knock down the pins.

7. She's Clingy

She always wants to cuddle. Always. It's not always a bad thing, but just know that she is very clingy.

8. She's Extremely Thoughtful

She would go to the ends of the earth to make you happy. She would drive four hours just to see you for twenty minutes. She'd give her life savings to buy you a milkshake if that's what you wanted. She puts effort into her gifts. She always makes sure you're happy.

9. She's Lazy

I'm sure if you asked her to marry you that you already know this, but she's lazy. She hates the idea of exercise and moving more than five feet makes her cringe.

10. She'll Hype You Up

She may be lazy and hate sports, but she'll hype you up on the sidelines--as long as she doesn't have to sit for too long. When in doubt, she always posts about her proudness on social media.

11. She Loves Steak 'N Shake

It's her favorite; make sure you know that. She loves Fresco Melts. But she's not really a fan of the shakes. She'll eat her fries and yours, too (with vinegar, of course).

12. She Needs Coffee To Function

She loves pour-over, but Starbucks is a good second. Iced Americanos are her life. She is a crabby, non-functioning mess until she gets caffeine.

13. She's Obsessed With Poetry

Need brownie points with her or just simply want to make her happy? Buy her poetry books. You're welcome.

14. She'll Get Overly Emotional

She'll get very sad when you're leaving, she'll get extremely happy when something good happens. Just watch out for when she gets mad, because it's extreme.

15. She's Been Hurt

She's been hurt before. She's been let down many times. She's had her trust broken. Don't be one of those people. Prove to her (and to me) that you're a good one. That you're the real deal.

16. Hold Her

Hold her when she's sad. Let her cry into your shirt. Rub her back. Just hold her every chance you get. Make her feel wanted, finally.

17. She Hates Pet Names

She thinks they're gross. Even "babe" and "baby". She will, however, compare you to an animal and then ingrain that into your mind so that every time you or her sees something somewhat related to that animal, she all but throws a party over it. (I have been labeled "Chicken"...I hope you get better than that.)

18. She Has A Hard Past

Take time to get to know her and all that she's been through. Accept her. Realize that you're not perfect and neither is she. Please fall in love with the ugly parts of her that make her her.

19. She Gets In Her Head Too Much

You'll think things are fine and then she switches over and she's in her head. Reassure her constantly. Pray with her. Be patient.

20. She Cares Too Much What People Think

It's a downfall. Help her grow through it, please. Maybe with you and I telling her positive things all the time, she'll finally realize that those negative things people say don't matter.

21. She Makes Playlists For Every Occasion

Going to be in a car for forty minutes? Playlist. Just got engaged? Playlist. Adopted a puppy? Playlist.

22. She Will Compare You To Anything And Everything

"You look like the candlestick from Beauty and the Beast" "That fish looks like you" "You're a stool" "This tree looks like you" "This monkey looks just like you" These are just a few things I've heard her compare me and others to. Don't worry, though, she means it in the best way possible.

23. When She Starts To Panic, You Need To Talk Softly.

Panic attacks happen. More often than we'd like to admit. Talk softly and hold her. Remind her to breathe.

24. She Cannot Cook

Not to save her life. I hope you know how to cook if you ever want to eat.

25. Finally, We're A Package Deal

You marry her, you basically marry me. I helped write all your texts when you guys were dating. I helped pick out your anniversary presents. I come with her, so I pray you and I get along. If you hurt her, I hurt you. Got that?

You have been blessed with the best woman that I know. She has her flaws, but she will love you better than anyone I know (besides Jesus). She will pray for you, and with you. Cherish her and lead her. I'm so excited to see how happy you make her. She deserves nothing but happiness.

Cover Image Credit: Abigail Stout

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I'd Rather Be Single Than Settle – Here Is Why Being Picky Is Okay

They're on their best behavior when you're dating.
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Dating nowadays described in one word: annoying.

What's even more annoying? when people tell you that you're being too "picky" when it comes to dating. Yes, from an outside perspective sometimes that's exactly what it looks like; however, when looking at it from my perspective it all makes sense.

I've heard it all:

"He was cute, why didn't you like him?"

"You didn't even give him a chance!"

"You pay too much attention to the little things!"

What people don't understand is that it's OKAY to be picky when it comes to guys. For some reason, girls in college freak out and think they're supposed to have a boyfriend by now, be engaged by the time they graduate, etc. It's all a little ridiculous.

However, I refuse to put myself on a time table such as this due to the fact that these girls who feel this way are left with no choice but to overlook the things in guys that they shouldn't be overlooking, they're settling and this is something that I refuse to do.

So this leaves the big question: What am I waiting for?

Well, I'm waiting for a guy who...

1. Wants to know my friends.

Blessed doesn't even begin to describe how lucky I am to have the friends that I do.

I want a guy who can hang out with my friends. If a guy makes an effort to impress your friends then that says a lot about him and how he feels about you. This not only shows that he cares about you but he cares about the people in your life as well.

Someone should be happy to see you happy and your friends contribute to that happiness, therefore, they should be nothing more than supportive and caring towards you and your friendships.

2. Actually, cares to get to know me.

Although this is a very broad statement, this is the most important one. A guy should want to know all about you. He should want to know your favorite movie, favorite ice cream flavor, favorite Netflix series, etc. Often, (the guys I get stuck on dates with) love to talk about themselves: they would rather tell you about what workout they did yesterday, what their job is, and what they like to do rather than get to know you.

This is something easy to spot on the first date, so although they may be "cute," you should probably drop them if you leave your date and can recite everything about their life since the day they were born, yet they didn't catch what your last name was.

3. How they talk about other women.

It does not matter who they're talking about, if they call their ex-girlfriend crazy we all know she probably isn't and if she is it's probably their fault.

If they talk bad about their mom, let's be honest, if they're disrespecting their mother they're not going to respect you either. If they mention a girl's physical appearances when describing them. For example, "yeah, I think our waitress is that blonde chick with the big boobs"

Well if that doesn't hint they're a complete f* boy then I don't know what else to tell you. And most importantly calling other women "bitches" that's just disrespectful.

Needless to say, if his conversations are similar to ones you'd hear in a frat house, ditch him.

4. Phone etiquette.

If he can't put his phone down long enough to take you to dinner then he doesn't deserve for you to be sitting across from him.

If a guy is serious about you he's going to give you his undivided attention and he's going to do whatever it takes to impress you and checking Snapchat on a date is not impressive. Also, notice if his phone is facedown, then there's most likely a reason for it.

He doesn't trust who or what could pop up on there and he clearly doesn't want you seeing. Although I'm not particularly interested in what's popping up on their phones, putting them face down says more about the guy than you think it does.

To reiterate, it's okay to be picky ladies, you're young, there's no rush.

Remember these tips next time you're on a date or seeing someone, and keep in mind: they're on their best behavior when you're dating. Then ask yourself, what will they be like when they're comfortable? Years down the road? Is this what I really want? If you ask yourself these questions you might be down the same road I have stumbled upon, being too picky.. and that's better than settling.

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5 Reasons Why I Don't Want Kids

Procreating. It's not for everyone.

dambro64
dambro64
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My cousin had a baby last August. She's absolutely beautiful and I love her to death, but she doesn't change my mind when it comes to wanting kids when I'm older. Truth is, I don't want kids. I'm sure everyone says this at some point in their life, and maybe I will change my mind in the future, but kids kind of freak me out.

Maybe I'm just not the most maternal person, but here's why having kids, at least for now, isn't on my bucket list.

1. Giving birth.

I know, I know, it's a beautiful thing, the miracle of life or whatever, but go watch a birthing video and then come tell me how beautiful it really is. Everything from a woman's water breaking, to actually giving birth just grosses me out, to be honest.

The thought of having to push something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a lemon is just absolutely terrifying. I have a pretty average to above average pain tolerance, but no matter how well you can deal with pain, that shit is obviously not a pleasant experience.

2. The responsibility.

You have to do everything for babies, literally everything. Feed it, dress it, wash it, change it, put it to sleep, and you have to know what a baby wants when it wants it. If I had a baby and it started to cry, I would have no idea what to do. I know plenty of people say that once you have the baby, you automatically know which type of crying is for what need, but that makes no sense to me.

Do babies have different types of cries? How do you know which is which?

I consider myself a pretty responsible person when it comes time to be accountable for myself, but to be accountable for another life form?

I'll put it this way. I have two pet turtles. We got them when I was about twelve or so years old, and I remember being obsessed with them. That lasted for like maybe two weeks, and then I got bored with them, which meant I didn't take care of them. My parents did. Not the best analogy for obvious reasons, but I'm sure you understand what I'm trying to say. In other words, if I can barely take care of a pet, how would I ever be able to take care of a small human?

3. Kids are messy and loud.

Look, I'm not like a total clean freak or anything like that, but my mother definitely is. She used to disinfect sticks so my sister and I could roast marshmallows when we went camping for Girl Scouts. My point is, it's been drilled into my brain that everything has to be wiped down clean, and germs are not my friends.

I hate being around sick people; they freak me out, especially since I get sick so easily. If my baby or child were to get sick, I'd obviously still have to take care of it, which means wiping snot, cleaning vomit, and getting coughed on. I guarantee you, as soon as my child were to get better, I'd get sick.

Don't even get me started on changing dirty diapers.

Also, if there's anything I've learned from my cousin's baby thus far, it's that babies put everything in their mouths. Any object on the ground, their hands, and feet; nothing is safe. Babies don't understand sanitation, so it's not their fault, but I just know that if I had a kid, it would be in a plastic bubble so it could remain as clean as possible.

Babies are also very loud. Back when I worked at a diner, we used to have customers with little kids and babies all the time. If the kid was unhappy for any reason, that child would scream its head off. I never understood how such a big noise could come from such a small human.

4. Kids are expensive AF.

Kids are not cheap. They have an entire laundry list of stuff that needs to be bought for them, and they run out of supplies frequently. I can't imagine how much money people spend on things like diapers, formula, and clothes. Speaking of clothes, babies grow out things quickly. You get one or two good uses of an outfit and that's it. They outgrow it, and they can no longer use it.

Then, as they get older, you've got to think about school, eventually college, and extracurricular activities that they want to do, gifts for Christmas and other holidays. I say all of this, realizing how much my own parents have spent on me and my siblings (thanks, Mom and Dad).

5. Raising kids looks hard.

Knowing how much my sisters and I were pains in the asses for my parents, I can't imagine having to deal with that crap myself. The whole idea of shaping a child into a fully functioning member of society with good morals and conscience sounds like a lot of work.

There have been so many times where I would be at work and I'd have to deal with customers that have their kids with them, and these children are the biggest brats I've ever seen. Rude, disrespectful, obnoxious or disruptive; just the opposite of how kids should act in any public setting.

A big part of the reason I wouldn't want kids is that I see other people's kids and the way they act. It makes me just want to yell at the parents. At least I know that if I do ever decide to have kids, they'll be raised the way I want them to be and they'll behave the way they're supposed to. Appropriately.

In the big picture of things, whether or not you want kids is up to you. It's not meant for everyone and that's not the end of the world. I always get told that I don't mean it when I say I don't want kids, which isn't that big of a deal, but it can get annoying. In my opinion, if a person says they don't want kids, it's not because they think kids are like some evil being or anything like that. It's because they know their limits.

Growing a family is an amazing thing, but it's also different for everyone. No one should be judged for not liking or wanting to have kids. Everyone has different opinions. This one is just mine.

dambro64
dambro64

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